"I have no control over how people will perceive me. The best thing I can do is be myself" It was mind-blowing to realise that I have no control over how people will perceive me. Even if I try to give Nice guy approaches, the outcome I'm striving for by doing that, still may not even happen. So the Nice guy would of course double down but it makes so much more sense to just be yourself because you have no control anyway, and that way you haven't wasted energy guessing! Action; Three traits you most desire to embody as a man (e.g. calm, confident, grounded). - Honest & Transparent - Maintains boundaries - Emotionally grounded The personal consequences of fully embodying each trait — how will it change your relationships, habits, and social dynamics? 1. This would mean putting myself out there even if it risks an argument/discussion. Not because the fight has been building but because I have made my feelings known 2. Maintaining boundaries would mean I would likely have arguments with some people. Even if I am going to look at it as an interaction of ideas. It's likely that this isn't guaranteed they will see it the same and may result in me having to hold my ground 3. By being emotionally grounded I'm going to have to address my people pleasing which will mean the amount I've been providing to others may not be same and will mean potential conflicts The fears or limiting beliefs tied to how others might perceive these traits? I'm most afraid about not being accepted for this version of me. If the true me is not loved by the ones around me. Because embodiment of these traits would mean showing my true colours. I'm afraid that who I am is not desirable, but I would rather die than exist this way anymore.

Yesterday I put my phone down for the day! Had it in the morning tell about 8:30 and checked it a couple times but it was good to not have it. It was an odd feeling for sure! Definitely some feelings of fomo!

Yesterday at bedtime well most bedtimes, is when I tend to crack and lose control of emotions or I’m just rushing through the routine of it. My oldest daughter likes to dawdle quite bit around these times and I always get on her about it. So not just this week but most days I lay them down I’m doing this but tonight before we start I’m going to breathe and get to a good spot in my core and be intentional with what I say and instead of correct actions I will connect with my actions. If I feel myself getting tight and frustrated I will breathe again and get through the bedtime routine without losing control and being grounded and more present during this time.

Last night I snapped at my partners Grandfather. I won't get into it but It was a stressful situation for all of us. Most the time I had been grounded but then when the tension of the situation rose and I had commands from multiple direction. I momentarily lost my feet and raised my voice. I re-grounded myself after this moment and helped out others in the situation and came to group with more presence. I apologised and thankfully her grandfather recognised the stress of the situation and my attempt to help, rather than the volume/tone it was portrayed. Nevertheless, this was a snap moment for me. Next time I will have a pattern interrupt - likely with a rubber band, to signal to myself that my anxiety is raising and I need to recognise the situation, not just the direction

Hey lads, I'm actually looking for some guidance here. I found out who my project supervisor is and I didn't get my first choice. So I'm gonna end up doing a project that while it's interesting, and I put it second for a good reason. I'm a little gutted about it, my first choice I really thought was something I was passionate about and could do something with in the future. I'm considering going to the course lead about it because they said at the start most people would get their first pick. I feel like if I don't fight for this, then I'm just doing the Nice guy trait of going along with It, even if it won't benefit me... I don't know if this just me being entititled though, is this just the cards I've been handed and I've gotta work with it?