Are the opinions of others so loud you can't hear your own voice?
12 years ago, I was in a job that was meant to be perfect for me. I should have loved it. It was the job that was going to get me on the fast track to promotion, a bigger title and a juicy pay packet. I was an Exec Assistant to a Director with about 2,000 staff. I was working evenings and weekends - because that's what you're supposed to do I was attending late night work events - because that's what's expected of you I was 'networking' with people as senior as possible - because that's what everyone does One incident sums up how trapped I was in the jaws of "that's just the way it is". At 11pm one evening I got a call from my boss. "I've got a meeting tomorrow at 10am, could you build this slide deck for me?" Unreasonable... maybe... but that's what I'd signed up for wasn't it? At 6am the next morning, the phone rings! "Have you finished that slide deck yet?" Even more unreasonable... yes... but that's how everyone makes progress isn't it? After 11 months, my boss got a new role, and I decided it was time for me to move too. I talked to his successor before she joined, and told her I was ready to go, so wouldn't be there when she started her role. She asked me if I could give her three months to get up speed and for some unknown reason I agreed. Wow! My life was changed by that request and decision to stay! In those three months, she took time to get to know me. Not what I'd done or how much I'd contributed or what I'd been involved in - although she did get those too - but to actually get to know me. To be honest, I didn't really realise she was doing it at the time. But she started to use what she was learning about me to point me to specific tasks, to connect me with specific people, to get me specific training. Things that I loved. Things that challenged me. Things that made me smile. She would encourage me "Show more of this side of you", "Use more of this part of your personality" "Let that version of Gus shine more". She demonstrated that too. She was a very senior leader in a large financial institution and she turned up every day as herself and made a massive impact - for the business, but for individuals, and especially for me.