How to get back to being very good and know about real friends
hi i am really confused at this point of time as first of all i am young around 15-16 so idk if this is normal to happen or it is happening with only me . Also this is a rly long post so sorry for that but i just wrote what i felt for a brief - i have a lot of friends in school but around 1 or 2 years ago i felt that even though i have a lot of friends and popular i dont think i have a real very good friend and thought i was too giving or laughing so everyone takes me lightly or what. So worked and did a lot of overthinking on that for past year or so. I from the experience i had decided of using thing like dont talk too much or like dont laugh very much and something like this cause i feel after that people take u lightly or like for granted or i expect way too much from each person. So it gave good results more or less people which took me granted either i left them or they understood .But recently what happened was i liked a girl who earlier liked me but recently lost interest in me bcuz she thought i didnt liked her and gave up . so i asked her but she denied as she was not interested now so this was also very sad for me as i thought it was going fine. So again i am feeling sad for the past month or two so felling depressed get into the cycle of overthink and sadness and i am recovering from it but there is just so much confusion as sometimes i feel i have everything but some time i feel i am just another random person. People like me but i am not very close to them . Like i feel many times that even thought i have a lot of friends but i cant stay with them and for too long as i just feel everything is not going correct. It is not i am like sad everyday or dont have friends, not at all but i feel that many times i feel sad thinking everything is going wrong. So there are just some main worries that am i thinking way too much as i dont think anyone think so much about all this and feel like this. I know i am in a position better than many but i want to improve it and be very good as recently i got to know i was rly popular around 1 or 2 years ago but not so much now and with every thing happening it all come at me thinking i am not doing enough or not have enough. Also sometimes i feel i am like not so childish in some things which other are so it separates me a bit and dont have some common habits which everyone has as i consciously dont want to thrash talk much and be on insta and stuff as i want to focus on my sports and career and they are major distractions.