"It's just not working!" If you feel like you’ve been “into self development” for a long time but you’re frustrated with the lack of change (or how long it’s taking to improve), this is for you. I’m going to help you figure out why all that content you’ve been consuming - videos, podcasts, articles, courses, programs - is NOT translating into a new life. read more here... Or listen to this;

Happy new years to all of you! To help you plan and prepare for 2026 to ensure it's better than any year you had before, I'm giving away free copies of my book The Legendary Life, which takes you through the entire step by step process for planning your life, including how to motivate yourself, write goals, and remove barriers. The first 10 people to comment "Legendary" get a copy! Cheers Dan

What does it actually mean to be a confident man? In this video, I break down confidence in a way most people never talk about it — not as bravado, dominance, or pretending you don’t care, but as living with integrity so you stop doubting yourself, seeking approval, or losing sight of who you are. This is part three of the Nice Guy Recovery series, and it’s specifically for men who have spent years compromising themselves to be liked, accepted, or validated — only to end up feeling invisible, disrespected, or lost. We’ll explore why confidence has nothing to do with impressing others and everything to do with impressing yourself. I explain how integrity works as an internal operating system, why honesty is the real foundation of confidence, and how constantly hiding your preferences fractures your identity over time. You’ll also learn why confidence requires risk — including rejection, misunderstanding, and upsetting people — and why avoiding those things is exactly what keeps nice guys stuck. I introduce the idea of “micro-honesty” as a practical way to rebuild self-trust without forcing yourself into massive, overwhelming changes. I also share a real client story that shows how a single honest moment can radically change your confidence, dating life, career, and self-respect. If you’ve ever felt like you’re playing different versions of yourself depending on who you’re with — or you’re tired of being liked but not respected — this video will challenge you in the best way. 👉 Watch the full video and see what happens when you stop trying to be impressive — and start being real.

Weekly challenge: - Do something normal in a weird unusual way, e.g. brush teeth with other hand every morning  New: - Welcome new members from last week - You can now get complimentary membership in exchange for supporting Brojo! DM me to ask about how - I’m currently testing a new virtual coaching app - Testimonials on About page - check them out In process: - 30 day challenge starts next week - Planning your 2026 for Success - New Nice Guy Recovery Roadmap short course fully developed - Redesigning Brojo membership, prices and value will both go up in 2026 - current members will be grandfathered in Recognition: - Rutger for being the GOAT with contributing to the group - Everyone’s engagement is increasing - loving the new posts! Reminders: - DGAF workshop recording in VIP course - Social Confidence and all other workshops now available in course - VIP access - VIPs will now get one practical workshop per month as well as a group coaching call

If you’ve spent years trying to be a good person—polite, helpful, easygoing, agreeable—and somehow ended up anxious, exhausted, lonely, resentful, and unsure who you actually are… this one’s for you. I’ve been coaching people pleasers and “nice guys” since 2013, and I can tell you this with full confidence: the Nice Guy strategy does not work. Not socially, not romantically, not professionally, and definitely not for your mental health. This week’s video kicks off a five-part deep-dive short course on Nice Guy Syndrome, focused on practical steps you can actually use to rebuild your confidence, repair your relationships, and reconnect with your real identity—not the mask you’ve been wearing. Here’s the core idea: Nice Guy Syndrome isn’t about being kind. It’s about performing niceness in order to get approval, affection, validation, safety, love, or some kind of emotional payoff. Over time, that performance becomes your personality. You stop being you, and you start being whatever keeps everyone else comfortable. And the cost is brutal. Most nice guys experience a lifetime of subtle (and not-so-subtle) anxiety. They’re constantly scanning the room for signs of rejection, discomfort, disappointment, conflict—basically anything that might reflect badly on them. You end up hyper aware of how everyone feels, yet completely disconnected from how you feel. There’s also that quiet resentment that builds over the years—this sinking belief that you’re doing “everything right,” while everyone else seems to get the success, respect, or affection you think you’ve earned. Meanwhile, you feel stuck on the sidelines, wondering what the hell you’re doing wrong. And because the whole system is based on keeping interactions smooth, pleasant, and non-threatening, nice guys never build the intimacy or emotional depth required for real connection. You can have a full social circle and still feel like an alien hiding among humans. You can be married and still feel utterly alone.