I am and also have been all or nothing. And i have now completed week 4. I feel so proud of myself. And im so grateful for this paul 🙏 Ive learnt to pause before responding. And just now knowing that when someone is reacting badily towards us is actually a reflection of themselves. Not us. That brings me alot of peace. I was always very explosive and reactive, but ive learnt keeping calm gets us alot further. And i 💯 protect my energy now. Im wide awake and i understand so much. Learning to love myself has been so powerful. Im so grateful to be where i am today. And i really do like who i am. I think i had alot of anger to let go of. I feel free. I have made it out of an abusive relationship this year and broke free from addiction. I am no longer in survival and i am living in peace. I am blessed and leanrt so much this year. I am excited for 2026 🙏💛

I misswd tuesdays so not sure if that was the last one

Was just having a phone call with my mum, trying to avoid certain things, as you do, was just checking in with her! So I ask her what you having for tea? She rambles off what she’s had all day to eat, finally gets to the answer.. don’t know what I fancy, might just have some eggy bread!! Don’t get me wrong, I do like eggy bread, haven’t had it for a while but remember getting it all the time as a child!! As someone who has ARFID certain foods or smells trigger me , mostly from childhood, I ask her why she fed us this all the time, sometimes with tomato sauce or as a pudding with jam? Her answer, it was real cheap, eggs and bread were pennies!! they got paid on a Friday, fed us crap then spent everything else in the pub, took a Chinese home for themselves while us kids were sleeping, you guys ate well in school didn’t you?? And they say us kids had a good life?? I don’t know the point of this post but it may explain why I very rarely eat on a Saturday night, if I do it usually crap!!

Just finished week 3. And i foegive my parents as they could only parent me with the tools they had been given. My dad espically had a very bad childhood. I was angry with them when i began ny healing journey. But i do love them and its the present that is important now. And they are finally aknowledging my growth and how far i have come and that means the world to me. I feel sad for them now that they never got to heal. And i thank myself for beleiveing in myself, not giving up. And learning to love myself. I am really feeling content for the 1st time in my 36 years. And happy that i got this chance to heal so my children can be whole. Its actually made me very emotional but for once happy tears 🙏

I was telling my mum how my brain still looks for something to worry about. I still dont know this new way of living yet. Peace. And she said i still do that and it wont ever leave you. I said it will leave me mum because im doing the work !! She didnt say nothig. But i know it wont be like thid forever. I have so much hope and believe now. I feel the changes. Like i didnt want to go gym this morning because im not well. But i knew id be letting myself down. The old me would have made excuses but the new me shows up. I am 💯 feeling happy again