I have a brother who is three years older than me and growing up I always got blamed when we were fighting even though he started it. He dropped out of high school when he was 17 and left home, so my parents helped him with money, which I think was fine. The thing is, he kept getting money from them as long as they lived while I got almost nothing. Since I was a child, I have been very responsible with money, choosing what to buy or not, while my brother could always ask for more. He chose to work part time because he didn't really want to work. After high school I got an inflammatory bowel disease and was surviving in a job with low pay for ten years, since I couldn't cope with stress. After learning how to better handle stress I went to university, to get a better paid and more interesting job. All this time, I did not get any financial support from my parents. University is free in Sweden, and you can get student allowance, so I could survive. In elementary school, they did our class an experiment with a couple of pupils with disabilities, a lot of rowdy boys and then a group of girls and a couple of boys who were supposed to be nice and quiet and to manage on our own without asking questions. That was a disaster of course, especially when you have a lot of energy that wants out. So, I learned to be quiet and to behave. But inside I died a little. After nine years I started high school with new people and was shocked when I got very popular and could start crawling out of my shell. After this, I have found myself bit by bit and let the little creative rebel out again. My mother once told me that my brother couldn't cope on his own, while I could. I never understood what my mother meant, and she passed away a long time ago. My brother started a family, and his son has been diagnosed with ADHD. His daughter is sure that her father also has ADHD and now that I know more, I am sure of it too. I'm also pretty sure my mother had it, so maybe she felt that my brother was going through the same struggle. While I was wearing all these masks to hide behind.

I have been wearing so many masks to fit in and push through and it still didn't work. I only realized last year, at the age of 60, that I must have ADHD, and these days made me think about my childhood and why I have been struggling so much my whole life. On day 3 the information started to sink in, that I can actually do something about this. Not merely surviving. I finally found an acceptance, both inside myself and from relating to other people in the challenge, and I feel hopeful. I would definitely recommend this challenge because it will give you so much, both information and knowledge about yourself and what you can do to be honest about who you really are.

Still in an extremely productive time phase. Feeling finished two projects that having been sitting there , waiting for me for the last two years! Oh and I got an interview for my dream job ( and totally in keeping with the AI report that points out what I am good at and what i love doing and thats creating scenic ambience , sets for various productions and teaching the se skills to others! So i uave applied for a position of Scenic art manager in a leading Theatrical Arts Academy in London . And this is a first interview I got after months of applying for various art jobs and not even getting anreply sometimes. So really even if I dont get this one, my confidence in my abilities has shifted over the last couple of weeks . I thank Jim and this community for helping me find this confidence !

So many things are starting to make even more sense. Phone with over 100 tabs open: seems to go to amiley face after 99 🤣. 2 laptops working sliw because of same problem. Anyone else with me? Best solution to just 'close' without watching?... ouch... too scary!. Maybe secretly hoping for a crash. Haha.

Wow I didn’t think the Q&A could be so useful. I actually skipped the day 2 Q&A recordings in the 5-day challenge. Then i had a feeling that I should listen to this, so I went back, and I am so happy I did. It was so good to hear other people’s struggles and how beautifully Jim answered them. Even when there was no clear solution to certain things, it just made me feel connected to others and these stories. And just the energy of the call already released something in me. 🙌✨