❓Why can't I get my kid to [insert action here] ❓ · NOGA FC

❓Why can't I get my kid to [insert action here] ❓

Are you trying to MOTIVATE your kids to do something YOU think is best for them? I'm curious, what does that usually look like?

I am sure you have heard the phrase, "You can lead a horse to water but you can't make it drink." What I find goes wrong for most adults is that they get stuck in a mindset that makes them feel like it is their job to MAKE the horse drink.

Fundamentally, what you end up doing is creating a resistance that wasn't previously there. The more you push, the more the horse says...I am not drinking that water!

Try this instead! Change your perspective. You do not need to MAKE the horse drink, you need to REMIND the horse that they are thirsty. Now, you can't remind someone of something they haven't previously thought of, so this is why I find it so important to begin any journey by targeting IDENTITY.

If your child is strong in their IDENTITY and you are presented with a scenario that requires them to make a tough decision or do something they may not want to do at the moment, all you have to do is REMIND them of WHO they are.

When you operate this way, you eliminate motivation from the equation and you replace it with discipline. The child now, in order to stay in alignment with their chosen identity, is no longer able to resist the water. They will be forced (by their own commitment and identity) to drink the water, whether they were in the mood for water or not.

The best part of this scenario is that you can stop trying to force them, changing your role from controller of their journey and police officer of their actions to loving supporter, teammate and confidant.

Way too often I see parents get stuck pushing too hard and not recognizing that the action of forcing creates more resistance.

If you have had an experience like this, share it with us below and let's talk through what a better process could look like next time you are faced with a horse that doesn't want to drink from the well.

0 comments

NOGA FC | No One Goes Alone

skool.com/soccer

We teach parents to connect with their kids using simple tools that build trust, deepen connection, and raise confident, identity-driven human beings.

Leaderboard (30-day)

🔥

+21

+17

+14

+11

+11