May '24 (edited) • 💬 General discussion
A Guide To Breaking Rapport
What's going on folks! I've seen many guys confused about the concept of breaking rapport that Michael constantly talks about, so I thought I would give you some additional clarification on what it really means and how to use it.
The term "breaking rapport" itself is what might be confusing you, but it is actually the least important part of the concept. You can replace it with other names such as "subverting expectations", "pattern interrupt", or "flipping the status quo", if that makes more sense to you. What it DOES NOT mean, is insulting, negging, or severing your relationship with the other person.
The easiest way to think about breaking rapport is as the moment in which you do or say something that takes you from the other person not really being interested in you or seeing you as lower status to all of a sudden being curious about you, liking you or seeing you as equal or even higher status than themselves. You are subverting/interrupting/flipping the idea they had of you for a more positive and desirable one that makes them more invested in you and your interaction with them.
The reason why this is an extremely powerful skill to have in your toolbelt is because chances are you are interested in meeting extremely beautiful women and networking with high-status men. If that's you, then as you meet these type of people in your journey, you're going to feel things like imposter syndrome or analysis paralysis because, let's be honest, many of these men and women will absolutely be above your weight class and you need to know how to interact with them.
There are several ways to break rapport that you can learn inside the MoA course, but I'll give you two of the main ones: humour and status.
Humour is the best one but also the hardest one to learn if you're not naturally a funny, charismatic individual. In the course, you'll learn some techniques to develop your humour, but you can always also learn from watching sitcoms or comedy routines. Here are a couple of examples:
To hot girl you're just meeting for the first time: "You're the worst girlfriend I've ever had. You never call, you don't visit me and you even forgot about my birthday! I'm done with you." If you deliver it with the right tonality and body language, she'll be laughing her ass off, no matter how hot or famous she is. She was expecting you to treat her like everybody else does, suplicating, giving her compliments, trying to please her, offering special treatment, etc. When you come out of the blue with a line like that which she was absolutely not expecting, that's the pattern interrupt or subvertion of expectations Michael is talking about. Not only did you take her by surprise, but you did so in a funny and charming way. She'll definitely be more open to what you have to say and now you're talking as equals and not with you as a fan looking up to her.
To a high-status man, say, a famous bodybuilder: "Hey man, when are you going to start hitting the gym?" Once again, a guy like that is always expecting everyone to treat him the same, praising his physique, asking about workouts and supplements, asking for a photo or autograph, etc. Then all of a sudden you come out of the blue with a question that's so ridiculous, you'll confuse the hell out of him but in a funny way. You subverted the expectation he had of you and interrupted the autopilot he's always on when interacting with fans that all behave the same. He'll be laughing with you in two seconds. Now you're no longer a random fan like every other, and he'll be more open to talking to you as equals.
Status is the other way of breaking rapport. This one has to be handled with care and requires a little more finesse, but it's extremely powerful when you can pull it off.
The classic example is in the video I posted here. These pranks are old school but they illustrate the concept well. Someone has a low or indifferent perception of you, but then you do or say something that shows them the opposite. In this example, the girl is rejecting the guy because he's acting like every other random dude that has ever hit on her; but all of a sudden, he walks towards his Lamborghini and creates a pattern interrupt in the girl by displaying a high status car. She was not expecting that (subversion of expectations), and now her whole attitude changes. Look beyond the "gold digger" critique, this is just to illustrate the concept.
Most guys here won't have access to Lamborghinis, but you don't need to. What's another way of showing high-staus? Your Instagram. If you have an amazing Instagram, with extraordinary photos that show you have a cool lifestyle, that's a great break in rapport that anybody can have, which is why MoA teaches it so furiously. It's a high-status card you can take with you anywhere. Most men's Instagram profiles suck. They're full of random photos, mirror selfies, and low-quality content. That's what most people (particularly girls) are expecting to see when you exchange Instagrams; however, when they see your profile and it completely breaks the pattern they were expecting by being so good, all of a sudden you're no longer the random guy, you're now the cool guy with the incredible Instagram that has a lifestyle most people could only wish for and which seeds the idea in her mind of the cool lifestyle she would live if she started dating you. Now they'll treat you differently and will be more open and receptive towards you. You've been placed in a different category in their eyes.
Hopefully that helps clarify the concept of breaking rapport. It takes some practice to pull off but it's a wonderful tool to have available to you at any time. There's obviously much more to it inside the MoA course than what I've shared here, so definitely give the programme a go if you want to take this skill even further.
Cheers!
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A Guide To Breaking Rapport
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