COMMON - UNITY = THE LIGHTBULB PINGS! THIS WORD...

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I’ve been sitting with the word COMMUNITY lately, like actually sitting with it, turning it over, poking it, side-eyeing it, because everyone and their dog uses it but hardly anyone talks about what it REALLY means.

My brain kinda did that thing where it goes quiet for a second and then goes, “oh… OH… HELLO THERE. BARARA.”(that is my brain btw, yes I am weird, yes I am owning it)

Community ain’t a platform. It sure ain’t a feature. It ain’t a strategy. It ain’t something you slap a name on and hope people behave nicely inside it.

Mwah

It’s a feeling. An internal hearty body-thing. A human thing. A “do I feel safe enough to be myself here?” thingy

And when it’s missing, everything else feels HARD AF. (that’s the meh part)

HERE ARE MY MIND BREAKDOWNS AKA THE PINGALINGS 💡

→ BREAKING THE WORD OPEN (LIGHT BULB MOMENT)

If you actually break the word down, it’s COMMON + UNITY.

COMMON, as in shared ground. Shared experiences. Shared fears. Shared “is it just me that has a name for my brain?” (hmm do not answer that lol 😝) thoughts

UNITY, as in togetherness, not sameness. Not everyone agreeing. Not everyone doing the same thing. Just choosing to stand together anyway.

That’s it. That’s the root. That’s the OG meaning before marketing got its marketing mitts on it.

Humans didn’t gather because it was pretty and cute. We gathered because it was how we survived. We needed each other to eat, to build, to grieve, to celebrate, to make sense of the world.

Our bodies still remember that, even if our calendars and apps have made us forget it.

→ HOW COMMON + UNITY IS ACTUALLY BUILT

(NOT THE FLUFFY VERSION — I SAVE THAT FOR DOGS + LOTS OF THEM) 🐾

Here’s what actually builds it, and this is basically my entire OBSESSION in life and business, HELLO.

Someone says the thing out loud that everyone else is quietly thinking but hasn’t had the guts to say yet.

A wobble. A doubt. A “this feels off but I don’t know why.”And suddenly ten people go, “OH MY DOG, SAME.”

That’s COMMON ground right there.

Showing up as a REAL HUMAN helps too. Not the polished pfffft kinda, filtered-to-the-max, guru-ish version.

The one with opinions, typos, weird humour, dogs walking across keyboards, and the occasional crisis over coffee (like the time I accidentally bought whole beans instead of ground coffee, with no grinder, like WTF, boo hoo, tears).

When one person drops the act, others loosen their grip. UNITY happens through permission, not perfection.

And it’s built in micro moments. Tiny commitments. A comment. A reply. A “hey, I saw that.”Not big dramatic speeches. Just presence. Consistency that says, “I’m still here,” even when nothing shiny is happening, we all can relate to this moments hey

That’s the EPIC stuff. That’s where momentum actually comes from.

→ HOW WE ACCIDENTALLY BREAK IT (OOPSIE DAISY)

Now the flip side, because let’s be real, yeah.

Performance kills community. The second people feel they have to be impressive or say the right thing, they shut up. They lurk. They scroll. UNITY quietly packs its bags and does one.

Hierarchy does the same. The unspoken “who’s ahead, who’s behind” vibe. Comparison poop energy.

Suddenly COMMON ground disappears and people start shrinking themselves.

Silence can break it too. Not peaceful silence, but no one responding, no reflection, no acknowledgment. The nervous system (yes, that word) reads that as rejection even if no one meant it that way. Oopsie daisy again…

And rushing people past their truth? Big NOPE. When someone shares something real and the response is instantly “here’s how to fix it,” the moment’s gone.

Sometimes people don’t need solutions. They need real human convos. They need to be SEEN, HEARD, LISTENED TO first.

→ MIMI-FIED ANALOGY (OBVS, WOOP)

Community is like a gym, but not the shouty, ego-lifting kind. It’s the kind where you keep turning up, doing small reps, building strength without even noticing. No one’s handing you a medal every time you show up. You just FEEL better. Stronger. All the good stuff

Or it’s like my local café stamp card. No fireworks. Just “hey, you’re back,” stamp, stamp, stamp, and after ten visits of breaking and BOOM free coconut cake 🎂

Sometimes I would like pickled onions, but obvs grateful AF.

You don’t go for the stamp. You go because it feels good to belong there.

→ WHY THIS SHIZZLE CHANGES EVERYTHING

When COMMON UNITY is strong, impact becomes a by-product. People move differently. They take risks. They speak up. They collaborate naturally. They stop burning themselves out alone and start building together.

How frickin EPIC is that.

That’s why I don’t chase noise. I build spaces. That’s why I care more about conversations than clicks. That’s why I’m obsessed with the WOOPS, the WOBBLES, the messy middle bits.

Because when humans feel held, supported, and not judged, they do BRAVE things. EPIC things.

That makes me very happy. Bonus sauce it’s heaps of FUN for all.

→ THE WOOP AT THE END (TOTES BRING IT)

So yeah. Community isn’t something you grow. It’s something you TEND to, like radishes (now I am no radish expert and tbh not sure if they even need tending, but it sounded cool to me, and yup I am human and do not have all the answers).

COMMON ground.UNITY 🥦

Humans choosing each other again and again.

And when you get that right? Everything else follows, bada boom!!

WOOP. 💥

Thoughts? Bring ’em.

P.S. (BACKROOMY DIDY BIT)

If you’re already inside THE BACKROOM, this is literally the work we’re doing in there, saying the thing out loud, wobbling together, letting the conversation do its thing instead of rushing to fix or prove anything.

And yes, it’s a dollar, simply because it keeps the trolls and spammy nonsense out, we truly do not have time for that poop, and honestly… it works a treat.

Right. That’s me. Over to you…

P.P.SYes, this image was created with Christopher aka Chatty 🤖

NO I did not suddenly unlock hidden cartoon-drawing skills overnight (HELLO, OBVS).If I tried to draw this myself it would be a stick human, one wonky dog, and something that vaguely looks like a coconut but might actually be a potato.

So yes. I’ll happily let the tech do the pictures…And I’ll stick to COMMUNITY, conversations, humans, WOOPS, WOBBLES, and saying the real thing out loud instead.

Phew - Everyone in their lane.

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