When a child is dysregulated, what they need most isn’t distance — it’s connection. Traditional “time out” often focuses on isolation. The child is removed, left alone with big feelings they don’t yet have the tools to process. From the outside, it may look like compliance… but internally, it can create shame, disconnection, or reinforce the belief: “I’m too much” or “I’m bad.” A trauma-informed approach leans into “time in.” Time in doesn’t mean allowing harmful behaviour — it means staying present through it. It looks like sitting nearby, softening your tone, and helping your child name what’s happening inside them. It’s co-regulation before self-regulation. Instead of “go away until you’re calm,” it becomes, “I’m here with you while you find your way back.” Because children don’t learn emotional regulation in isolation — they learn it in relationship. When you choose connection during dysregulation: - You show them their emotions are safe to feel - You model how to move through overwhelm - You build trust instead of fear - You teach, rather than punish This doesn’t mean it’s easy. Staying regulated while your child is not can feel incredibly challenging — especially if it triggers your own nervous system. This is where your awareness becomes the work. Slowing your breath, grounding your body, and responding instead of reacting. Connection is the intervention. Over time, “time in” helps a child develop the internal capacity to pause, reflect, and choose differently. Not because they were forced to — but because they were supported enough to learn how. And that’s the goal. Not obedience. But emotional safety, resilience, and secure attachment. If you haven't checked out my parenting workshop there is a video as well as a PDF on your children's emotions, its in the parenting with a narcissist section but there are somatic trauma informed resources too. Tx

This is a hard topic… but an important one. There is often a strong link between trauma and suicidal thoughts. Not necessarily because someone wants to die - but because, at times, the nervous system feels overwhelmed by what it is carrying. And this is where an important distinction matters: Thoughts are not the same as intent. Having thoughts like “I can’t do this anymore” or “I want this pain to stop” does not automatically mean someone wants to end their life. Often, it means something else entirely. An analogy that might help: Imagine you are trapped in a dangerous building. There is smoke. It feels overwhelming. Your body is on high alert. What does your brain do? It starts scanning for exits. Every possible way out. Windows. Doors. Fire escapes. Even options you would not normally consider. Not because you truly want to jump out of a window… but because your system is desperately trying to find a way to survive. 💔 Trauma can feel like that building. When the emotional intensity gets too high, the mind can start searching for any possible exit from the pain. Sometimes those “exits” show up as suicidal thoughts. That does not always mean we truly want to die. Often, it means our system is overwhelmed and trying to find relief. You are not “bad” or “broken” for having these thoughts. Thoughts can pass - especially when you are supported and regulated. You do not have to face that intensity alone. Healing doesn’t happen in isolation - it happens in community. If you are struggling right now, please reach out to someone you trust or a crisis support service in your country. You deserve support, safety, and space to breathe. With love, Chris ❤️

Today marks the start of a new week, what if you began it by reconnecting with your source? 🪄 Healing Hood Take a moment to tell yourself what you’ve done well, what you’ve achieved (nothing is too small!) while you're giving yourself a gentle pat on the shoulders (right and left hand on right and left shoulder, respectively). Then move your hands up and over your head (as if you were putting on a hood) and continue gently over your face down to the upper edge of your upper lip. Imagine there’s a spring of wonderful, healing energy above you, giving you exactly what you need and wish for, an unlimited source that continuously nourishes you. Enjoy how it continues to support you even after you finish the exercise and carry on with your day. Simple and yet surprisingly powerful. What is one thing you can acknowledge yourself for today?

Hey beautiful souls, Ive been reviewing the energy of this space, the objectives of the community and thinking about what would serve you all. The general meet and greet hangouts were a space for you to meet each other and create a sense of shared community in healing, when only a very small handful of the same people come and hang out (which is really lovely of them to engage and i'm really grateful for their time and energy, im not knocking that at all) it doesn't create that wider shared experience for you all, and i'm thinking that having no agenda was too loose and overwhelming and off putting for the rest of the community. Therefore im changing things up. This is what im offering next and ill start to fill the calendar - energy updates and reviews of the current energies - these will be recorded and shared with me leading the conversation and guiding the topic, giving direction and tools - shorter Q&As around coaching and healing - these will be recorded and shared - circle / wisdom circle - this will go deeper and not be shared. Ill create these around full and new moons or when something is coming up in the collective that i think you might want extra energetic support with I'm going to try this out until summer, if it doesn't take off then ill cancel the community calendar and ill create videos lead by me and share these without the wider participation so everyone can engage in a more solitary way in their time when it feels right to them. Anyone who wants time with me will need to book into my calendar or DM me. Im excited to try this more contained and clear structure so you all know what to expect and you can join what feels right for you, feeling like you will get something from your time. Tx

When we talk about the 'real you', the authentic you, coming back to your true nature what do we mean. Vex King in his book 'healing is the new high' words it as this Who would you be, how would you feel, and what would you do if you'd never been hurt? If no body else existed, or had ever shared their opinion about you. This question is an interesting journal prompt to get you thinking about the you under the trauma, pain, fears, limiting beliefs, negative experiences, stories, pre existing programming. One of the questions I often ask my clients when we start to work together is 'how safe do you feel it is to just be you, to live as you want, how free are you to just be you'? Interested to hear your reflections if you feel called to share. Tx