We’ve all been there…That moment when a decision should feel clear. The pieces seem to line up. You’ve prayed, processed, and maybe even gotten a green light. But instead of peace…You feel heavy. Hesitant. Unsettled. 💭 “Why do I feel off when this felt right yesterday?” 💭 “What if I mess it up?” 💭 “Why can’t I just be at peace in this?” Let’s bring this into the light. Whether it’s about your marriage, a move, a parenting decision, business direction, or just navigating life together—it’s easy to confuse godly pressure that refines……with the internal pressure we create from fear, control, and the need to get it right. That second kind? It clouds your ability to hear clearly and act with confidence. Here’s what we’ve learned: 🔁 Pressure isn’t always holy. When it stems from fear of failure, idealism, or self-doubt, it becomes a counterfeit voice—one that sounds spiritual but keeps you stuck. 📖 “Trust in Adonai with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding…” (Proverbs 3:5–6)→ Peace often comes after the step, not before. God’s direction meets motion. 📖 “Do not be anxious about anything… let your requests be made known to God…” (Philippians 4:6–7)→ Prayer brings peace, but it doesn’t replace movement. Sometimes clarity comes when you act. 📖 “He who watches the wind will not sow…” (Ecclesiastes 11:4)→ If you're waiting for the “perfect peace” to start—whether in your marriage or elsewhere—you may never plant. 📖 “You do not know what your life will be like tomorrow…” (James 4:13–15)→ God’s sovereignty isn’t a reason to pause—it’s the reason you can move without fear. 📖 “Seek first the kingdom… and all these things will be added…” (Matthew 6:33)→ As you align with what matters most, everything else begins to flow. 📖 “It is for freedom that Messiah has set us free…” (Galatians 5:1)→ If your process feels like striving or fear-driven perfectionism, it’s time to return to the simplicity of walking in Spirit-led freedom. So what can you do instead?

It's fun at times to go back through some of my old writings from when I wrote a lot more than I do now. Here's a piece I wrote back in 2018, and it's still good for me to read it again. Maybe it will be for you too. === Let It Go Sometimes, the best gift you can give yourself, is to Let It Go. Sometimes life is hard. Sometimes deep, unanswered questions bounce inside the mind like a yoyo on a string. Sometimes we get so caught up in our pain and struggle and personal drama that surrounds us, that it becomes our identity. Some of us struggle with feeling fat and ugly and stupid and useless. Some of us went through a bitter divorce. Some of us lived thru ugly abuse and fatherless homes. The list goes on and on, of the crap that life dishes out. The choices that other broken humans make, that then continues its broken path in the next generation. But I'm here to tell you, sometimes the best gift you can give yourself is to let it go. I'm not suggesting to be flippant about the past or present realities. I'm not suggesting to live in denial. I'm saying, take all the crapbola from the past. One by one, pick them up. Acknowledge it. Feel it. And then take it in the palm of your hand. And then open your hand and release it. It owes you nothing. If someone broke your heart.. Let it go. If someone stole your innocence.. Let it go. If your father abandoned you, or abused you.. Let it go. If your church backstabbed you, judged you, and cared only for its own agenda.. Let it go. If your own family disowned you.. Let it go. This seems like a hard message. Maybe you're saying, But Eric, you don't understand !! I can never forgive my (fill in the blank) for all the pain and suffering he caused me!! But I'm here to tell you, hard and painful as it can be to let go of all our hard, bitter feelings, from our hard, bitter pasts, it is still much more easy than carrying all that buried pain for years and years. Letting go Is painful. But it is also freeing. If that is you, carrying the what-ifs, the if-only's, the broken dreams of a broken past..I'm here to tell you.. Let it go.

⸻ Do We Throw Out the Baby with the Bath Water? With nearly 80% of our clientele coming from Anabaptist backgrounds, we’ve been on a journey of deep learning. The nuances… the layers… the unspoken codes. The culture runs deep. And so does the programming. We’ve walked through the heartbreak and the breakthrough. We’ve sat at kitchen tables, inside barns, at weddings, and in the quiet of late-night conversations—listening for the heartbeat beneath the lifestyle. This past weekend, while at a wedding in Ohio, one of our clients couldn’t wait to dress us up. Amish threads, head to toe. Her face? Pure delight—laughing hysterically as she saw us fully suited in her world. It was one of those moments you never forget. And it stirred something in me. After all the years of walking people out of high-control environments, I’ve noticed something consistent: It’s rarely the clothes or the chores people are running from. It’s the control. The emotional repression. The weaponized guilt. The abuse of Scripture in the name of order. But once the heart begins to heal… A tenderness often returns. A deep appreciation for what was beautiful—community, family, work ethic, simplicity, rhythm. So much richness is there… if you know how to look for it. And while we never shy away from naming the abuse—because the trauma is real—we also don’t believe healing has to equal hatred. So I’ll ask you this: When you leave a culture, religion, or community that hurt you… Do you carry offense forever? Or can you do the work to reconcile your heart? Can you sift through the rubble and find something worth keeping? That’s what maturity looks like. That’s what healing invites. And that’s what allows us to walk in wholeness, not just freedom. What have you learned to appreciate again—after leaving it behind? ⸻ #highcontrolreligion #amish #mennonite #anababtist #freedom #healing #reconciliation #epicyourlife

@Jesse Kauffman I really liked what you wrote about the age gap on Facebook and I decided to respond here and here's why: I've been in a relationship with a young man for awhile and since I was married and have children, I don't want them finding out about Tumi and I on Facebook. So once Tumi and I really know what our future hopefully holds then we will tell my children before posting on Facebook. Anyway back to the age gap. I used to look down on people who were to many years apart in age and for some reason ten years was the magic number. Well then I got to know Tumi through Facebook dating and I don't really remember age really coming up right away. But after we had spent some days and hours in chatting I finally realized that I didn't know his age so I asked. I was about blown over by his answer of 32. I'm currently 50. Immediately my mind went what will everyone say especially my children. Also we're in two different stages of life and I really couldn't see how that would work. We finally talked it out and I realized that the ONLY thing keeping me from being okay with the difference was my worry about what others might think and decided that definitely wasn't of my Daddy. So,yes, we've had a lot of interesting discussions about things that most couples don't even really think of talking about but it's been good for us. We both feel strongly that our Daddy is the only One who would have been able to bring us together like we did. Hopefully sometime soon I'll be able to share pictures and more details with you all. And I end saying don't go and close the door that your loving Daddy is holding open for you or you'll miss many wonderful opportunities to love and be loved.

I had a client tell Carlos and I recently… “You two are some of the most non-judgmental people I’ve ever met.” They went on to say that this is why they could trust us so deeply. That one statement hit me. Sometimes I’m aware of it… And sometimes I forget just how deep the fear of judgment runs in the hearts of the people we work with. I’ve been reflecting on it—especially within Christian circles. How often we hear, “This is a safe place,” but people don’t feel safe. How pastors and leaders with good hearts still emit the energy of judgment. How entire church cultures unknowingly breed bondage… even when the message is grace. Why is this? Why does the fear of judgment still dominate the atmosphere of so many places meant for healing? I think it’s because people are often trying to manage appearances, theology, and control—rather than truly see the person in front of them. They think helping equals correcting. That listening means “waiting to respond.” But in our work… trust is built because we hold space for the messy, the growing, and the discovery. We don’t need to fix you. We want to know you, and for you to know yourself. We don’t believe your story disqualifies you. We believe it’s what equips you, and will show you how. People are longing for a space where they can breathe, cry, unravel, ask questions, wrestle, not know, mess up—and still be seen as good. That’s the culture we carry. That’s the work we do. That’s the bridge we build. Because at the end of the day, people don’t leave religion because of God… They leave because they never felt truly loved while being fully known. And we’re here to change that. #EpicYourLife #trust #judgment #grace #mess #safety #love #christian #amish #mennonite #control #bondage #freedom