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Apr 28 •
📣 Meet the Woman Behind This Community
Most of you have heard me mention Charlene. You've seen her name, heard me reference her work. She's been in the background — by choice — while we laid this foundation together. That changes this week. She's stepping in directly, and I want you to know a little about who she is before she does. 🤍 𝐇𝐞𝐫𝐞'𝐬 𝐚 𝐟𝐞𝐰 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐋𝐢𝐟𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐰𝐨𝐦𝐚𝐧 𝐡𝐚𝐬 𝐰𝐚𝐥𝐤𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡: 🔹 Grew up in constant motion: 4 grade schools, 4 high schools, 4 colleges, a different state and city for each 🔹 Sober since 1981: 44+ years of real, lived tools for self-examination 🔹 Experienced the trauma of abuse in early romantic relationships and healing that comes with a good marriage. 🔹 Married in 1990: celebrating 36 years together this year 💑 🔹 Faced cervical cancer: no insurance, had the surgery, came out cancer-free 🔹 In 1996, a contractor laying new sewer lines in the neighborhood put them in backwards — flooding her home with sewage. Every affected home had to be completely remodeled. She spent 7 months homeless, still in school full-time, working part-time, while her husband fought the contractor and an attorney to make it right. 🔹 Crohn's diagnosis in 2000: medication-free by 2011 🔹 Business/Marketing degree + 2 Engineering degrees + 30 years in research, marketing & copywriting 🔹 Started her business in 2008: then learned how to talk to strangers and speak from the stage by going to Toastmasters 🔹 Certified Mindfulness Practitioner 𝐀𝐧𝐝 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐬𝐨 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐰𝐡𝐨 𝐲𝐨𝐮'𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐮𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐝𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐚𝐬 𝐚 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐨𝐧: 📚 Always reading at least 3 books at once ... fiction and non-fiction both ✍️ Wrote her first poem at 9, her first book at 11, published in magazines as a teen ... and still writing today 🎱 Plays pool competitively in local, regional, and national tournaments 🔬 Loves science ... physics and neuroscience equally fascinate her 💬 Straight-forward ... she will say it directly, no fluff She's not here to sell you a morning routine or a 5-step framework. She's here because she's genuinely figured some things out ... about clarity, self-examination, and what to do when life gets loud.
2d •
Apparently my self-care today was being completely ridiculous 😂
I'm home alone today, sore, and taking it easy. I took my meds, heated up a sausage-gravy pot pie, grabbed my orange juice and water, and settled into my chair. Then Snapchat reminded me that filters exist. Well…challenge accepted. 😂 Somewhere between ridiculous hair, giant eyeballs, glamorous makeup, a screaming egg 🍳, and eventually becoming a golden queen 👑, I realized I was genuinely having fun. And throughout my self-care journey, I learned something valuable today. ❤️ Maybe I don't have to polish everything before I let people see it. I didn't plan this moment. I didn't research it. I didn't turn it into something productive first. I wasn't trying to teach anybody anything. I was sitting in my chair being an absolute goofball because it made me laugh. And maybe that counts too. I've been learning that self-care isn't always another task to complete or something I need to do "correctly." Sometimes it's eating something, drinking enough, resting when I'm sore, taking my medication, laughing at myself, playing with ridiculous filters, and allowing myself to simply enjoy being alive in that moment. The lesson didn't come before the play. The lesson came because I let myself play. Maybe everything doesn't need to be polished before I share it either. Maybe sometimes being authentic, messy, goofy, thoughtful, serious, ridiculous—and completely myself—is enough. So here's today's highly scientific self-care progression: 😌 → 😂 → 👁️👄👁️ → 🍳 BLULULUL → 👑 Apparently enlightenment comes in mysterious forms. 🤣❤️
7d •
What if we're stirring too soon?
I’ve been thinking about baking, perfectionism, experimentation, and what it actually means to trust ourselves. And strangely enough, I keep coming back to a Great Depression water pie I made. I had never made one before. Honestly, I had no idea what to expect. You literally pour water into a pie crust, sprinkle the dry ingredients over the water, and the directions very clearly tell you: DO NOT STIR. Every instinct says, Surely I should mix this together. But I didn’t. I put those dry ingredients over the water, slid the whole strange-looking experiment into the oven, and basically hoped for the best. 😂 And you know what? It worked. The finished pie reminded me of a different kind of custard pie, and it was genuinely delicious. But I've realized there was another lesson hiding in that pie. I had to let something look unfinished, strange, and uncertain without immediately trying to “fix” it. And that made me wonder: How often do we interfere with something because uncertainty makes us uncomfortable—not because anything is actually wrong? Sometimes we may be evaluating ourselves while we're still in the middle of the process. This isn't working. I'm doing this wrong. I'm not good at this. I should be further along. So we stir. We change the plan. We compare ourselves to someone else. We abandon the experiment. Or we decide the outcome before we've even given ourselves enough time to discover it. Maybe self-trust isn't always knowing exactly what to do. Maybe sometimes self-trust sounds more like: “I don't know how this is going to turn out, but I can tolerate not knowing long enough to find out.” There's an important difference between patiently observing a process and ignoring evidence that something really does need changing. Eventually, we look at the result, learn from it, and adjust. But an unfamiliar middle isn't automatically a bad ending. Sometimes the ingredients are still sitting on top of the water because the damn pie hasn't baked yet. 😂🥧
9d •
self-care as support vs. self-care as performance.
Can self-care unintentionally become another form of pressure or perfectionism? We hear so much about what we should be doing for ourselves—meditating, exercising, journaling, eating well, maintaining routines, getting enough sleep—but even healthy practices can begin to feel like another checklist we're failing to complete. So here's something I've been thinking about: How do we recognize when self-care has shifted from supporting us to becoming another expectation we place on ourselves? And on the days when our energy or capacity is limited, what does realistic self-care look like for you?
9d •
Insomnia
So, I've always had an issue with insomnia all my life. However, now it seems I only sleep maybe four hours a day! Over the years, I have tried pretty much everything you can, prescription (hates the side effects), supplements, and old wives tales (home remedies). It haven't found anything that works yet. It just seems the older I become the worse my insomnia is. Does anyone have any advice? I have an overnight schedule, and so we go to bed between 8-9am. We have blackout curtains up through the house to help keep it dark. I have the hardest time falling asleep, even tho I'm exhausted. It doesn't matter what time I go to bed, I seem to be up between 1-2pm. The only prescription medicine I'm on is progesterone. I've been on prescriptions off and on since I was 3 days old, and I would prefer to not add anymore prescriptions. I appreciate any and all suggestions! I hope all you beautiful ladies have a day as amazing and beautiful as you!!!
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