Round 2 · High Vibe Tribe

Round 2

I did this reset only a couple of months ago and I discovered such great insights that allowed me to begin to love my partner more. The relationship imploded and he bullied me out of our home. I’m not feeling bitter and sad about this…angry yes! But it’s helped me notice a few things about myself that will stop me attracting a relationship like this ever again.

I genuinely couldn’t remember what I’d written in round 1 of the reset even though it was only a couple of months ago. I’ve just looked back and it was a much weaker version of what I’ve just written now.

I’ve had a lifetime of being put in a box, told my feelings aren’t important, play along or be punished. I’ve been petrified of the punishment - the fear of the physical, mental and abandonment punishments. My biggest breakthrough has been understanding that voice in my head that is constantly playing out real and imaginary scenarios, is trying to make myself heard, smoothing out the story, trying to make myself feel safe. This internal torment has been trying to keep me safe by not allowing me to feel the fear of the punishments and the abandonment and everything being taken away from me.

Well no more…I’d already started pushing back this week against my ex. In fact I experimented just to see what he’d actually do and what I noticed is, he’s just a bully! I didn’t give in to his demands and turned round and said NO and who cares about the consequences, they are his to own! Stop paying the bills, do it! suffer the consequences. Try and become between me and my son! Do it! The fear around this is being transformed.

This is such a breakthrough for me! I could kind of see it but all of a sudden it’s crystal clear! Stop managing my environment and protecting those around me who aren’t protecting me! Stop letting that voice in my head stop me from feeling. How others act and behave is their issue. I no longer need to fear punishment and abandonment, it is a childhood fear that my nervous system and subconscious have held onto to keep me safe.

I’m grateful that I saw the red flags (at least I saw them and felt them) I just chose to ignore them because my nervous system found relief in a relationship that had patterns that felt like home to me.

Love equals fear ➡️ love is expansive, safe and nurturing and I deserve it to the moon and back 💖

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