When we commit to healing our trauma, our mind may rebel. Why? Because we're not just healing our wounds. We're challenging the entire survival system we've spent years building around them. We learned to please everyone to avoid rejection, control everything to avoid disappointment, and build walls to avoid getting hurt. Then we decide to change, and our brain hits the panic button. "EXCUSE ME! We've been surviving this way for 30 years. Who authorized this nonsense?" 😂 Our mind isn't necessarily our enemy. It's an overprotective bodyguard who hasn't realized we're no longer living in the same war zone. So when healing feels uncomfortable, remember: not every resistance is a sign to stop. Sometimes, it's an old survival strategy struggling to accept that we have other options now. We're not broken. We're outgrowing the version of ourselves that had to be. And our inner bodyguard? Bless its heart. It's time for a performance review. 😂💜

Day 4 HW: I discovered why I am so tired.

Story of love and self love I believe the world thrives in love I believe love makes our world balanced and happy I believe love corrupted is destructive and harmful I believe I have been putting layers of quote unquote truth over the honest version of The Creation I am meant to be. Like many life jackets trying to protect that creationI believe it was so unsafe to love in my house that I wasn't loved or protected it was absolutely a world of what can I gain from using you without limitation and they called it love I have always believed that love is healing helpful and supportive only never destructive or harmful Story of self relationships I believe relationships are to be based in love and common belief systems when system is healthy though in today's climate relationships have become very dangerous because it has no more safe boundaries people are taught to be however and whatever they want without limits so they are controlling demeaning destructive violent and murderous absolutely not safe. Men and women I believe there should be a balance men support and protect women nurture and heal unfortunately ego comes and destroys this men have more power quote unquote strength women are weak this isn't true so then men have to protect at all costs not the women but the life they choose to exist in with no consent no boundaries from feminine counterparts creating a atmosphere where women and children are no longer cherished and or nurtured violence and control become the energies of the situation and no one is safe anymore Dating. I don't date I haven't in 10 years don't care to dating is a dangerous game where two people put on the rest the best version of what is thought to gain whatever is most desired by all means lies and manipulations needed to gain said situation or article whatever. Healthy relationships are balanced no he said she said there is mutual respect and honor for one another before any other though this hasn't been supported since the 1900s... And through it all I guess I just think life is dangerous because love is dangerous men and women are dangerous together or apart relationships are dangerous because they're traps and dating is dangerous because of the lies that put you into that trap.

It was a bit overwhelming but I feel like I’m getting on the right track.

Not going to lie this was freaking hard. Trigger warning. Extreme violence included. One before I was three I was in the hospital at least once a week blew chronic bronchitis they said honestly my dad would throw me over his head by my wrist against the wall and watch me slide down so he could resuscitate me sometimes it didn't work so when my mom's cat knocked him off the roof for being awful too said cat my dad caught it and killed it by throwing it against a telephone pole in front of me telling me I am only allowed to live if I am super good and useful oh how that framed my beliefs so I reframed it that wasn't easy I am so powerful I was able to live through many attempts on my life I am a powerful person with a powerful purpose I'm all miracle able to see and accept or not accept at my own discretion I have choice to live in hate like my dad or find my own path of Love light and healing and nurturing. Aaron DID I DO THIS RIGHT? I hope that is the way that's supposed to work out cuz that was so hard.