Let’s Talk About Self-Promotion: What It Is and How to Build Genuine Connections Without It

Self-promotion—it’s a term that comes up often, but what does it really mean? At its core, self-promotion is any action focused on highlighting yourself, your business, or your services in a way that seeks attention or gain without aligning with the context of the conversation or community. It often feels out of place, like it’s more about “me” than “we.”

What Does Self-Promotion Look Like?

Here are some common examples:

1. Dropping Links Unprompted: Sharing your website, product, or group without being asked or without it being relevant to the discussion.

2. Hijacking Conversations: Commenting on a post with a lengthy description of your own achievements or offers that shifts focus away from the original topic.

3. Overbranding: Using every comment or post as a chance to promote your expertise rather than engaging meaningfully.

While self-promotion often comes from good intentions—like wanting to help or share value—it can unintentionally create distance instead of connection.

How to Build Genuine Connections Without Self-Promotion

The secret to avoiding self-promotion is simple: focus on the other person, not yourself. Here’s how to do it:

1. Lead with Curiosity:

• Ask questions about someone else’s perspective or experience.

• Example: “What inspired you to share this? It really resonates with me.”

2. Add Value Without Selling:

• Share tips, insights, or encouragement that align with the conversation.

• Example: “I’ve tried [specific approach], and it worked well for me—let me know if you’d like more details!”

3. Engage Authentically:

• Use comments to build relationships, not platforms.

• Example: Instead of saying, “I help people with that too—here’s my link,” try: “I love this topic! It’s something I’ve explored a lot, and I’d be happy to chat more.”

4. Welcome Others with Heart:

• Use genuine greetings or fun GIFs to make people feel seen and included.

• Example: “Welcome to the group! Can’t wait to see your contributions!” paired with a GIF that reflects your personality.

Why Does This Matter?

When you avoid self-promotion and focus on connecting, you build trust. People are naturally drawn to those who engage sincerely, not those who constantly try to “sell” themselves. Trust leads to meaningful conversations, deeper relationships, and eventually—when the time is right—opportunities to share your expertise in a way that feels natural and welcomed.

So, here’s a challenge for you: for the next week, focus on genuine engagement instead of promotion. Compliment someone, ask a thoughtful question, or share a helpful tip without expecting anything in return. Let’s create a space where we connect, inspire, and grow together—no strings attached! 💬✨

What are your thoughts on self-promotion versus genuine connection? Let’s discuss below!

39 comments