I still continue with my drawing. I’ve created some quite beautiful pieces, but the one I always go back to and pray for is my Vortex 🌪️ 9. It’s my second painting, and I truly feel like it came from my higher self. While I was creating it, I didn’t even realize what I was drawing until the painting was finished. ⚜️

I wanted to ask something to the people here who went from “doing well” to genuinely reaching another level in business/life — for example from consistent 20k months to 50k+, or from 5 to 6 figure months. Not only strategically, but internally. I’ve noticed something in myself recently and I’m trying to understand it deeper instead of just forcing my way through it. Last month I reached a trading goal I had been working toward for a long time, and then for some reason I gave back almost half of it. It felt less like a lack of skill and more like some kind of unconscious ceiling or worthiness pattern. Almost like every 2 steps forward, I take 3 back. And the strange part is: I know how much I’ve already overcome to even get here. Trading changed my life in many ways. It’s what pushed me into healing, breathwork, emotional regulation, self-awareness, learning about human behaviour, self-love, discipline, and becoming a better person to myself and to the people around me. It stopped being only about money a while ago. I also don’t really want to become a content creator or chase attention online. I genuinely love trading itself because of how deeply it mirrors psychology and identity. It exposes everything. What I’m trying to understand is: what kind of inner work, belief work, nervous system work, paradigm shifts, or identity changes did you have to go through to stop unconsciously returning to old patterns when you were close to the next level? Because I do put a lot of work into myself daily, it is 24/7. I work with a holistic therapist every few days, I do breathwork, meditation, self-observation, and I’ve become much kinder to myself than I used to be. Before, I would destroy myself mentally after mistakes. Now I can hold myself with compassion while still taking accountability. But still… I sometimes catch myself behaving in ways that don’t match the person I know I’m becoming. In trading we often say: “the market pays you exactly what you believe you’re worth.”

One idea stood out: retirement, weakness, and stillness are not opposites of strength or activity — they are part of the same cycle. In Taoist thinking, true action doesn’t always mean doing more. Sometimes it means stepping back, allowing things to unfold, and returning to a simpler state. “Heaven and earth and everything are produced from existence, but existence itself comes from nonexistence.” A reminder that not everything needs force to move forward.

Please watch, Read the captions & share with all you know!!!! My home most of my 47 times around the sun is not the same at all!!! So much to say here about this but basically it is Mordor (in all aspects--they are cloning humans and putting entities inside them that do not belong in this realm--not all clones are bad it depends on who programs them--but I am not a clone but people used nanobots to manipulate me until I bought colloidal gold and did other nanobot detoxing methods--I know this sounds crazy but true) I was put in the hospital after I came back from Pasadena where I have no recollection of meeting Dr. Hernadez at all, and I have been hunted, tortured, terrorized since Feburary 2025 (called "it" and asked things like "Do I slap my vagina & reset") & on & off but extreme in 2026! But I will keep using my physic abilities & point out all the MFs that want to mess with me, I do not care how much money they have or how much they control people in the matrix. Sequestering humanity is evil you can create 'Heaven on Earth" and humans could give from the over flow of their cups instead of draining our bio-fields at amusement parks, concerts, sporting events, some churches, etc... (now they are event installing them in public places all over in digital cities like Pasadena & Maui). Please see & watch the Mordor destruction for yourselves: https://vimeo.com/1189212280 https://vimeo.com/1189212386 https://vimeo.com/1189212279 The sad thing is they could mine in Appalachia mountains and mines are already there and people need work there, and there is still plenty of Coal there, so why the Rocky Mountains??? I have realized nothing in my life has not been curated, I have had multiple people tell me I have been trapped in my own "Truman Show" for a long time but I had no idea I as in a show or a movie. I was told My image and clones of me have been sold into pornography from a young man Joshua Johnson of our home town Idaho Springs in Colorado. I was also told everyone in my life sold me into porn or such to "save" my life since 2010 when I went to Greece to represent a film I was one of the producers on entitled "Beauty Mark." Not that it matters but I have never sold my body, I have been consciously in pornography, and I was faithfully devoted and never cheated (though would not even cross my mind) to my former partner and Father of our three children of 23+ years. Yet I endured extreme abuse and suffering my whole relationship from him. So I turned all my energy to healing and being the best I could be for that day, living as Tolle's book "The Power of Now."

Since returning to Formosa, I have encountered many situations beyond words. I realized that using nicknames can imply a lack of respect, and addressing someone directly by their surname is considered rude. This reminds me of an ancient teaching: "Teaching by words is inferior to teaching by example, and teaching by example is inferior to teaching by environment." In this context, "environment" (Jing) can extend to the state of meditative absorption (Samadhi), yet it also reflects the reality of human relationships. Enduring this is painful. This is clearly explained in the philosophies of Laozi and Zhuangzi. Despite having only a primary school level of Chinese, I somehow possess a deep understanding of classical texts. I find Taoist scriptures easy to comprehend, as if I am experiencing them personally. Energy manifests in various forms, and religious energies differ from one another. As someone in arts and visual effects, I find these impossible to replicate. My reflection is that after WWII, many lost their heritage and family upbringing. Everything started from scratch, making it impossible to learn traditional culture; most of it was destroyed. In the struggle for survival, morality was naturally lost. Now that I see things clearly, I must make a decision. It is a feeling of profound helplessness.