Finally able to wear hats again. I have several vintage hats but this is a new Stetson Stratoliner beaver fur felt as of last season. It wasn't cheap but it looks fantastic, much better in person than in the photos. Keeping my mostly bald head warm and stylish. To be honest I struggle wearing hats in public, it is so over the top but I am trying to fight through those feelings of awkwardness. I am sure we have all experienced that. When I first started dressing better I went through that too. I am totally comfortable with that now.

I'm surprised we don't have a "dating" category like we did in the last S/OG, so I'm going with "Mental/Physical Well-Being". Anyway, I recently discovered the YouTube Channel "Hoe Math". I know, the name is a bit inappropriate. I don't believe in calling ladies "hoes" (with very rare exception, and even then, it's usually when in the confidence of other men when venting), even if they can act that way. However, beyond the word, the channel makes a lot of great logical points about how dating dynamics work, recognizing one's value, recognizing the how and why behind modern disturbing dating trends, and provides several great tools to determine if any relationship has an equal amount of give and take, referred to as "The Table". As a great sample/intro video, I've added that below (first video). It's about the host reacting to a video where a "lady" with a septum piercing (big red flag off the bat) is trying to make a weak argument that sleeping with 100 men is no different than sleeping with one man 100 times. Yes, she seriously tries to argue that. What does Hoe Math do? Actually breaks it down in a very logical and reasonable way, with some amusing illustrations. I especially felt our younger members could greatly benefit from this, as the host also describes several of the obstacles they'll likely encounter in the modern dating scene, and pitfalls best avoided. The next video is called "The Table", and further breaks down that concept of give-and-take in relationships. Video #3 is another example of a "lady" who uses the "I am the table" argument to exploit services from men, and in return maybe giving them a little attention. When you finish this video, I guarantee you're probably going to vomit in several ways (mentally, emotionally, maybe even physically), reevaluate where you stand with the women in your life, and hopefully make some drastic changes. Spoiler alert: I see this behavior consistently here in California. It's mind boggling how many times what starts as a nice exchange between myself and a prospective lady who shows several signs of strong interest, quickly turns into my being disposable and ghosted as soon as I establish a boundary and decline to do something for them when they either stop stepping up reciprocation, or start withholding base level reciprocation (pulling back the attention they give regardless of my consistent effort). I've never before lived in such a place where it's one-way-benefit transactional as here. Sure, there was always a "transaction" process in some form, but it used to be a little more equal.

Happy Halloween Eve, Ladies and Gents! Usually, I'd label this "cooking", but since it's a combination of food art and a recipe, going with the broader "Culinary Arts" label. For those curious, while I certainly could have done a more thorough job on this carving (especially compared to last year), I do have training from when I went to Culinary Arts school around 20 years ago. Much of the "food art" was focused on in a class called "Garde Manger". Technically means "cold dishes display area", but encompasses soups, salads, aperitifs, canapes, hors d'oeuvres, terrines, sausage-making, and of course the fine art of carving cheeses, vegetables, fruits, and arranging them into art. I digest... Despite my tight schedule due to custody, I just finished carving the pumpkin, and when I come back, will roast the seeds. First, pumpkin carving tips: - Clean the pumpkin (outside, wiping it down with a damp cloth/paper towel. - Carve out the bottom first . - Why the bottom first? For easy access to the light element replacement, and mess reduction. - Scoop the seeds out, and separate them as well as possible from the pumpkin pulp. - Place the seeds into a strainer over a bowl or pot. - Place the pumpkin right-side-up over a large pot. - Carve the top opening. - Scoop the sides, and it'll fall directly into the pot below (see pic). - Place the pattern onto the pumpkin and fold the corners to fit the contours. - Start with the small/most detailed areas first. - Cut at an angle (about 45 degrees or greater; to allow for more light). - Avoid cutting on an angle around thinner areas (makes it less stable). - Once major cutting is done, clear the area (inside and out). - Refine detailed cutting. - Once finished, I like to wipe a thin layer of oil on the outside to preserve it and add shine. Roasted Pumpkin Seed Recipe From this site. Very simple recipe. - Clean the seeds in a strainer. - I use hot water to soften them a bit, though you can also boil them. - Once clean and dry, toss in melted butter. - Add seasonings of choice (see my ingredients of choice below). - Bake at 300 degrees Fahrenheit (150 Celsius) for 45 minutes. - Let cool and enjoy.

Forgiving vs. Forgetting - Forgiving is a conscious decision to let go of resentment or anger toward someone who hurt you — even if you never get an apology. - Forgetting, however, isn’t usually realistic. The brain remembers painful events to help us protect ourselves in the future. So while you might not be able to erase the memory, you can reach a point where it no longer triggers strong emotions. I have had time Lately to reflect upon my life and times I have been wronged, or wronged others. I know in my heart that I have been able To forgive all people who have wronged me. But the mere fact that I still THINK about these people and I remember what transpired I realize that I have not forgotten, nor will I probably ever. The same probably goes for people who I have wronged (people who I have apologized to for my actions). I believe because I expressed remorse and apologized that they more than likely have forgiven me but I doubt they will truly forget. I suppose as long as one can be at peace with it that somehow eases not fully forgetting. There was once someone who deeply hurt me and basically lied to me which wound up destroying my life at that time. I tried maybe a year or so after that to meet up with him to see what he had to say about what happened. He never apologized at all….so I told him to leave (and I was not nice about it) and he slithered away. Oh I had already forgiven him for my own sanity but I never forgot. Then at least another 10 years passed and I divided to meet up with him (reluctantly). I wanted to hear that apology that I so desperately needed. We Chatted and caught up a bit but then I had to actually ask him if he thought about me (he said every day) and then I asked if he was sorry for what he did…. He finally did apologize but I feel I had to drag it out of him. At least for people that I wronged, I always apologized . I think that it is an important part of forgiving someone. Just wondering how you all feel? Has anyone hurt you or wronged you where you did forgive ? And if you did forgive, have you actually forgotten. Or is there someone that you can never forgive ?

Last last friday - so a bit over a week ago - I went camping with my girl. We had a wonderful time, walking through infinite woods and swamps and enjoying the very refreshing air of the taiga. It was freezing, though we are used to it. One place we went through and in which approximity we slept was literally named ”Siberia.” We had a great time, a relief from everyday life. I am waiting for the next time already!