90 days, no virtual “entertainment”.
I made a decision yesterday to go 90 days without any YouTube, TV or social media like IG or Facebook. I have been in recovery from addiction for a bit over a year now and I see my “condition” manifesting in other areas. Earlier in my recovery I knew that stepping away from tv, porn and other things was important for me to heal and have space to lend my energy to stillness, self care and receiving wisdom. I was abstinent from these things for many months until I got a bit comfy. Much too comfy… and I, like with many things, hyper focused, obsessed and couldn’t stop even when I wanted to. This is a problem I have that I find when I really like something I don’t want to stop and even when it becomes painful, too much or harmful, I just want to stay and keep indulging. Sooo… what I’m trying to say is that I have choosing as of yesterday to go 90 days abstaining from these things. I will be able to see myself wanting them and experience the pause and action elsewhere. I am seeing where so much of my energy and focus was going… where now I can either do yoga, meditation, go to a recovery meeting or come on here and watch the coursework we have on here. I can also do self care, call friends and go be in nature. It’s like the very things I was isolating from, became an option when I not longer have the option to use the tv and all that. So for me, this process isn’t so comfortable always. It is peaceful at times but also, I go to food and then perhaps sex etc. however, without that intense barrier with the tv and things, I can now focus on the other areas I may be abusing as well - food, obsession with cleanliness to the point of panic - sex. Things along those lines. I just wanted to share how healing and freeing it feels for me to let go of that which I am holding onto so tight, it’s not just one perspective I am gaining but many!