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Owned by Alfie
A space for honest conversations and practical support around mental health, pressure, and purpose. No fluff, no judgement, no pretending.
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191k members • Free
7 contributions to SPEAK
1d •
Speaking up
Most of the time I generally feel positive, I have done a lot of healing over the years for different experiences, but today I really don’t feel myself. So I thought I’d do a post because I know how important it is to speak up. I am a mum to a little lady who has fought cancer, and has lost her leg in the process to save her life essentially. Some days are better than others. We are on a prosthesis journey right now. There are days when it fits easy and other days it doesn’t for some reason, and this really stresses out my Freya. And in turn stresses me out. Sometimes I bounce back quickly, and other times the feeling stays. I am trying not to suppress it when it gets too much. We have yet another prosthetist appointment incoming through the post. Which I really dislike because appointments can interrupt my schedule. There are times when I feel like a really bad mum, I know it’s out of my control but wheeling her around more often than not lately is taking its toll. I just want her to grow in confidence and independence. I know these negative thoughts are far from the truth. I just wanted to put this out there because i know it’s important to speak up about our struggles. Lots of love
1 like • 22h
This is strength. Not weakness. Strength. First things first… you are not a bad mum. A bad mum doesn’t sit there worrying about whether she’s doing enough. A bad mum doesn’t carry the emotional weight of prosthetic fittings, appointments, routines, and still show up. The fact you’re questioning yourself tells me you care deeply. You’re allowed to feel off. You’re allowed to feel frustrated by appointments disrupting your schedule. You’re allowed to feel drained by pushing a wheelchair when you just want to see your daughter run free. None of that makes you ungrateful. None of that makes you weak. It makes you human. Your little girl has fought something most adults wouldn’t survive. And you’ve fought it with her. That kind of long-term resilience doesn’t mean you don’t wobble. It just means you keep going despite the wobble. The prosthesis journey is not linear. Some days it fits. Some days it doesn’t. Some days confidence is high. Some days it dips. That’s normal in rehabilitation, physically and emotionally. The stress reaction you’re both feeling isn’t failure. It’s adjustment. And here’s something important: suppressing emotion doesn’t make you stronger. Feeling it, naming it, speaking it like you just did… that’s the healthy path. You model emotional honesty for your daughter every time you choose to speak instead of bury. You want her to grow in confidence and independence. She will. But she’s also learning something even more powerful right now: She’s learning what strength looks like from you. You’re navigating grief, hope, logistics, motherhood, trauma, resilience and identity all at once. That’s heavy. Anyone pretending that’s easy is lying. Today might feel heavier than others. That doesn’t erase the healing you’ve done. Keep speaking. Keep feeling. Keep loving. You’re doing better than you think. Sending strength to you and Freya.
3 likes • 1d
It really was a lovely send off for Roxie. Moments like that reinforce the mission!
2d •
Just wrapped up a site visit with Glencar
Proper solid day. Met a lot of the lads and the energy was bang on. What stood out most was how open people were to talking, although it took a min to get the point across, it was well received…. Some may say maybe even more than the pizzas! That openness is exactly what this space is about. No pretending. No masking. Just real conversations and a willingness to look at things differently. We are here to lift each other up, hold each other accountable, and get comfortable being uncomfortable. Growth does not come from staying where it feels safe. Nothing changes if nothing changes.
5d •
Reasons to stay
Hey lovely’s 💚 I come across this website, and I thought it would be a great tool to help you get through the days when things feel a bit too heavy. And if in crisis, please talk to someone (eg. Samaritans 116 123 or even 999) Lots of love everyone You deserve all the happiness in this world 🥰https://www.reasonstostay.co.uk/
1 like • 5d
Love this such a great post, thank you Shannon
22d •
Welcome to the SPEAK community.
This space exists for honest conversations about pressure, purpose, and mental health, without pretending everything’s fine. You don’t need to have the right words here. You don’t need to perform. Just show up as you are. If you’re comfortable, introduce yourself in the comments: • Where you’re based • What’s been heavy lately • What you’d like to get from this community Read more than you post if that’s what you need right now. Support others when you can. Take what helps, leave what doesn’t. This only works if we keep it real and respectful. I’m glad you’re here. Alfie Founder, SPEAK
1 like • 5d
@Leanne James Thanks Leanne, really appreciate it, hopfully we can catch up on the zoom sessions we will be having throughout the weeks.
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@alfie-ruffell-2701
Alfie Ruffell here, founder of SPEAK — building real conversations, practical support, and stronger minds where pressure actually lives.
Active 22h ago
Joined Jan 21, 2026