I refined my intentions again: I want to know what makes me persist I want to show up for myself the way I show up for others I want to be a magician I want to understand what it takes to change my life And from that, i made my Living Intention: EDIT: My intention is to know what makes me persist in this work. My intention is to continue to show up for myself the way I show up for others. My intention is to continue to be a magician by applying the skills im learning to the relationship I have with myself and my community. My intention is that I understand what it takes to change my life by using these tools to pay close attention to myself.

Where in my life have I been drifting rather than directing? - In doing my ManOS classwork What decisions am I no longer willing to outsource to habit, fear, or other people? - Doing my morning and night routine What does choosing myself look like today? - Answering these questions and posting these responses What intention is already forming in me that I have been avoiding or ignoring? - Looking @ ManOS classwork at least 5x's per week

I was happy with 3 of my 4 intentions from yesterday. The only one I want to rewrite is "I want to be a man who keeps his word when it comes to his own spiritual hygiene". Idk, it just didn't sit well with me. It felt a little corny and a lot of extra pressure, and theres already enough pressure. I'm changing it to: I want to Be a Magician. I do sound baths, guided meditations and I help people prepare for and integrate psychedelic journeys, and to me, the skills I've learned to be with people while they move through those states are magic. And doing the spiritual hygiene (baths, meditation, working out) is a part of being a magician, because it's me taking time for myself so I can show up fully.

What do I want to know? - I want to know what makes me retreat from my spiritual hygiene when work at my day job picks up. What do I want to do? - I want to stop disappearing from ManOS & spiritual hygiene when pressure from my day job and my sound bowl business picks up What do I want to be? - I want to be a man who keeps his word when it comes to my own spiritual hygiene What do I want to understand? - I want to understand why I keep repeating the same morning & night routine patterns

I love words so I could word-smith this for hours, but here is where my intention landed as a "living intention" **I care how my actions affect others, but their interpretation does not change who I am. I will not flinch at accusations born from emotion. I acknowledge the emotion beneath the accusation and allow it space without defending myself.** Flinch is an important word because for me pausing is the hardest part I'm trying to learn to do and you can't pause and flinch. The other element is allowing space. I've always lived by trying to control the situation and then it ends up controlling me. if I'm pausing sometimes the situation will just work out on its own. But it never can if my response is a knee-jerk, defensive move.