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29d • BEDFORD TO BALI
FIFTH DAY IN BALI (FORTH DAY AT THE RETREAT)
PLAYFULNESS, EXPECTATIONS, HEALING & CONNECTION
HOW THE DAY STARTED.
Today started off with some laughter and playful yoga, which was really different to the normal kind of yoga that I do. It was fun and I actually really enjoyed it, even though I felt a little bit awkward at times and a bit uncomfortable. We don’t normally lean into our inner child like that, so it felt unfamiliar, but it was really good to do.
After the morning yoga, we sat down and had breakfast, and my original plan for the day was to stay at the retreat. It was free time, so I was going to just chill there, maybe do some work, do some crocheting, do some journalling, and have a bit of downtime and me time.
WHEN THE PLAN CHANGED.
That plan changed.
Some of the girls were talking about going to Kato Healing, which is a very famous healing place that was on Eat Pray Love, the film with Julia Roberts. It was something I’d really wanted to do, so I was like yeah, sure, I’m up for that.
There was a bit of time waiting around for other people, which is not something I’m good at. I find it really difficult being in limbo and not knowing what to do. I didn’t want to get my laptop out and start working only to be disrupted, so instead I was chatting to one of the girls I hadn’t spoken to much before. We ended up chatting about life, which was really lovely, and getting to know her better.
Me and her were both waiting, and she said, “Why don’t we just go? We’re both sitting here waiting anyway.” And honestly, she was right. So that’s what we did.
HEALING EXPECTATIONS VS REALITY.
We headed off, got a taxi into Ubud, and went to Kato Healing. We did the prayer meeting and blessing, and if I’m honest, it wasn’t what I was expecting at all. It was very short, very generic, and not very personal.
I came away feeling really disappointed. With how much it’s talked up everywhere and by everyone, my experience just didn’t match that at all. It also wasn’t exactly cheap for Bali either, and for a two-minute conversation, it honestly felt like a bit of a rip-off.
So yeah, I left there feeling a bit deflated.
WALKING IT OFF & SMALL WINS.
Me and the girl I was with went for a walk into Ubud centre to look for some water shoes for tomorrow’s activity. We looked everywhere, and could we find any? Could we fuck. Not anywhere at all.
We ended up going back to where I stayed when I first came to Bali because I know the food there is good and it doesn’t upset my tummy with my gluten intolerance. We had to walk through the bit where the monkeys are, and I absolutely bossed it.
I was so proud of myself. Proper busted it. No anxiety, just walked through happily, which was massive for me.
FOOD, DECISIONS & MASSAGE MAGIC.
We went and had some food, then while we were eating we decided to go back to one more shop to see if we could find some shoes, and then head back through to get a massage at the place I’d already been before because I knew it was an epic massage.
We didn’t get the shoes. There were fake Crocs everywhere and they wanted ridiculous money for them, and we just weren’t paying that for something we were only going to use for one day.
But the massage? The massage was beautiful. Really needed. Properly lovely.
After that, we got a taxi back to the retreat.
PLAYFULNESS & LAUGHTER.
When we got back, we did laughter yoga, which again was very different. Very playful, very fun, very uncomfortable at times, but again it was about bringing out the inner child. That’s really what today was about — playfulness.
Then we played a game, which was fun. I honestly can’t remember what the game was called, but we played a game and it was good fun. After that we went off and had dinner, and after dinner we played another game.
I’m not going to give that one away, but it was a really good game. My little brain took a bit of time to work out the pattern, but when it finally clicked and the penny dropped, I was proper chuffed with myself.
CONNECTION & ENDING THE DAY.
Once the games finished, I checked in with Lils. I’d been messaging her throughout the day, and then we did a video call. I was downstairs with everyone when I video-called her, and she said hello to Mimi, then actually came out of her shell a bit and spun the phone around to say hi to everyone there.
She did amazing. I was really proud of her.
After that, I came up to my room to do a little bit of work and carried on chatting to Lily for a bit, and now it’s time to switch off.
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FIFTH DAY IN BALI (FORTH DAY AT THE RETREAT)
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Documenting my journey: real, raw life as a neurodiverse mum. First solo trip to Bali 🏝️
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