Stop bleeding on people who didn't cut you.

A topic we really need to talk about: Stop using trauma as a justification to hurt others.

In Pakistan, a lot of families are unhealthy because of this. We don't normalize counseling before marriage. We also don’t give ourselves time to heal from past traumas before entering new relationships, whether it’s a friendship or a marriage.

After a certain age, it becomes your responsibility, and no one else's, to teach yourself what you were deprived of. It’s on you to unlearn and let go of toxic habits. Flaunting anger issues, being emotionally unavailable, and refusing to communicate your feelings are just excuses at that point.

Life is unfair to everyone in different ways. Some get it a little, others get it a lot. But you can’t spend your whole life whining about how cruel it was to you. The trauma you faced can’t be justified, but it is your duty to heal, grow, and create safety in your own mind.

I'm learning this too. I read this on Instagram today and thought it was worth talking about.

And this poem resonates with it perfectly:

"it takes courage

to heal your wounds

and then clean

your hands,

so you don’t touch

other people’s spirits

with the blood of

your own scars."

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Stop bleeding on people who didn't cut you.