There's a lot of neuroscience and brain wiring in the way these things work, but to keep this simple - example, in terms of things like failure, a toddler will fall over 110 times while walking the full length of 10 football fields in one day.
Yet the toddler will never turn right and say,
- "Oh, I'm not very good at that!
- I'm failing!
- I'm not going to try again."
The toddler just gets up and tries again.
One of my mantras would be
- There is no failure, only feedback.
- Feedback leads to knowledge.
- Knowledge leads to confidence.
- Confidence leads to competence.
All of our learning is through feedback (failure).
In behavioural terms, it's just a simple contingency that most people don't understand.