Aug '24 • All Members Post Here
Personal Update
What a week last week was...
Just wanted to say a big THANK YOU if you attended the Live Reading of Expert Coach Secrets.
Personally, it was a super hard week for me.
I had to change Bambi’s meds.
She’s one of my chihuahuas, you see.
Bambi & Belle :-)
Anyway, Bambi has epilepsy and gets regular seizures.
I’ve been managing it for years now.
But this week has been really up and down.
One minute she’s passed out looking like she’s dead, and the next minute she’s doing an 18 hour marathon round the flat like she’s at the Olympics!
It’s just the randomness of it all.
It constantly creates unbalance for me… because I love structure, routine and balance.
For the last 3 years that she’s been having seizures, I always only go to bed when she settles.
And I know she’s asleep and calm.
Whilst doing the book reading this week…
She didn’t sleep a wink.
Pacing up and down all night.
Of all the weeks.
By Thursday I was praying that she would just fall asleep so I could rest.
I know for some it may seem silly.
I know also its a first world problem.
I know also some may say:
“It’s just a dog”.
However…
Unconsciously, I just haven’t been able to sleep knowing she may need me to help her get out of a seizure.
Nothing in life is meant to be easy.
And I just can’t not care for her. I have always put her needs before mine.
That’s the sacrifice I made when she got ill.
And I love her.
I remember when I was young, my dad said I couldn’t have a dog because I wasn’t responsible enough to have my own dog…
And I was so upset by this.
Bambi is my first dog.
And I will never forget the journey we have been on together.
And maybe there’s a part of me that thought I would have a child.
But that didn’t happen.
So a dog is what I have.
And she has been the perfect dog for me.
And I will never give up on her.
No matter what happens.
However, on Thursday I hit a new level of pain…
And then I realized I’ve done my best:
I can’t do anymore.
If I get no sleep, I get no sleep.
If I sleep and she dies, I have done my best.
If I am so tired that I fall asleep during a live Zoom call with hundreds of people?
It is what it is.
I’ve done my best.
No matter what happens…
I get to do it all:
I get to have no sleep
I get to care for Bambi as best I can
I get to pitch my new retreat in Bali
I get to do those things with these thoughts
I started crying softly.
Didn’t want to wake my partner.
And then Bambi came over.
Settled under my arm…
And we feel asleep.
So no matter what is being thrown at you this week even if it is causing you to question your life…
If you feel yourself saying: “I can’t believe I have to do this…”
And it’s causing you stress?
Try this instead…
For example:
I was saying “I can’t believe I am going to get no sleep.”
Switch to “I get to have no sleep.”
“I get to wait for her to rest.”
“I get to read a new book.”
“I get to pitch an amazing retreat.”
Etc.
Because one day…
I won’t get the chance to do any of it.
Hope that makes sense?
Alright, that’s enough sharing for today :-)
If you do wanna check out the book I was reading last week then you can grad a free copy here Expert Coach Secrets.
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Personal Update
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