Environment, Connection, Authenticity · Foundations of Ascension

Environment, Connection, Authenticity

Okay today it’s clear I’ve been isolating, I’ve been having trouble trusting in myself and surrendering, difficulties with connecting and balancing. It’s difficult to feel what is my energy and or self and what isn’t. I’ve had a panic attack a day ago and started a job that I couldn’t even be physically capable of doing simple tasks to the point I ended up needing to get on the floor and stretch. Now I’m looking for a new job since the previous one had to let me go. Therapy isn’t helping only advising me to take prescription pill. Only friend seems to be in his own problem and as for family I understand they have their own incompatibility to provide with emotional support. I’ve come to terms with the unhealthy asking of support and the fear or pride that is preventing me from asking what I truly need or even if I need anything. It feels like I’m being pulled from left to right and deep down I just want to yell. I don’t know what to do. I’m here for advice tho as for regulating it seems I’m pushing them away then actually sitting down to untangle and when I do try it’s like there’s intensity there.

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