清明節是我美國老公最愛的台灣節日

清明節是我美國老公最愛的台灣節日

Ok. To be fair, Lunar New Year is his number one but it’s a given so I’m going to say that Qingming is a very close second.

故事時間，單字就讓大家自己找囉！

🌈 他在清明連假跟我父母「提親」

February 2017, he proposed to me (with no ring 😂 but we will save the story for another day). We knew that he also had to "pass" my parents' test because at that point, we only knew each other for 1 year. April 2017, during the Qingming Festival long weekend, he sat down with my parents and some elders in my family to formally "propose" to my parents. He spoke Chinese, prepared notes and wore a nice shirt. It was a big deal!

🌈 跟我回台東掃墓的經驗讓他大開眼界

On the same long weekend, he visited my grandparents' graves and my uncle's, going through the rituals of praying, preparing offerings and even "speaking" to them. He saw the big tents outside of 靈骨塔, tables full of food and air filled with burning incense. It was crowded, smokey and noisy but there seemed to be an order. He was amazed.

🌈 深刻感受靈性和精神上的心理療癒

He felt a spiritual connection when I "showed" him to my late uncle. This uncle was a special person in my life and I always said that I wish my uncle could have met him. And on that long weekend, he did. It was a deeply emotional and intimate experience for the all of us.

🌈 他本身跟自己爸爸就會有去看爺爺奶奶墳墓的習慣

My husband and his father always had the habit of visiting grandparents' graves. Not all the time, but often, compared to average American families. They would light a candle, clean the graves and talk about memories of them. So it is safe to say that the concept of 掃墓節 is not strange to my husband.

🌈 希臘人的家庭觀念比一般西北歐國家深

You may be surprised to learn this but Italians and Greeks (and Hispanic) have quite strong family values. They stay close. It is also common to see grandparents taking care of grandkids, even in multi-generational homes（多代同堂）. Doesn't it sound similar to Taiwan families?

我自己都驚訝，但是也很欣賞老公對我和家人的尊重。老實說，我身邊聽過的案例常是女兒變成「潑出去的水」，搬到國外後跟家裡的交集願來越淺，家裡也覺得因為老公是外國人，所以妥協很多傳統觀念或習俗。我覺得有點可惜了！

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