Warning…This is a long one! I am not offended if you don’t read all. My middle daughter and I are in Orlando. I am so grateful for the modules 1-3 and Catherine lecture Tuesday May 5th! Day 1 “I put my ears on”. My daughter stressed with her work that she literally arrived at our long planned Disney restbit “unhinged” and disrespectful to the workers at the airport when she picked me up. She had an arrogant, I deserve everything attitude. We got into the car and she continued ranting. I just paused until the rant was over. Then I just parroted back “It sounds like to me your trip here was very stressful and you didn’t stop a long way and make sure that you had meals or even water am I right?” she agreed. Then I said how about we solve that problem first what are you hungry for? Day 2 As we we’re entering Universal Epoch Studios, She became unhinged again. This time the rant went in for longer and when it was over I paused again. This time I was box breathing because of the rant was personal. ( ignoring the personal insults of my adopted 33-year-old) What came out was, “ so what I hear you saying is that your job is so stressful that you feel like you have no place of peace?” she said yes, then I responded with “ Have you considered what options you’d like to take with that?” she calmed down and I did my best to give her space to think. She spun up two more times in the park. And I used the same tactic. I did eventually fail. And at the end of the evening, when she dressed me down for in the line to the bathroom “Didn’t you just go to the bathroom 15 minutes ago?” So I lost my resolve at 10pm and said “there’s no need to embarrass me in front of this line of people.” And I walked to find another restroom. And instead of following along behind. She left the park, while I was in the restroom. Without any text message or telling me where she went. It was closing time and she abandoned me. With no way to get to the hotel and not even an address for it. She finally answered the text message and told me she went to the car. I had to ask where the car was and with no signs in the parking she to get walk back to find me.

My daughter called today asking for advice about opportunity to change jobs. Instead of quick questions and my thoughts, I asked what she was thinking and why. I then said I think you know the answer. She said just talking about it out loud I figured it out. She sounded so confident in her ability- just because I kept my mouth shut- lol

I find myself in a boot because I broke a bone in my foot. Not exactly something I want to deal with right now but life happens and we often have to deal with things we didn't plan. I handle things like this pretty well most of the time but sometimes, I get weary and have less patience with myself. We are often generous with everyone but ourselves and I want to be sure that as you enter this Mother's Day weekend, you show respect to the woman in the mirror. Treat her like a best friend. She deserves all the love and kindness she can get.

I am so proud of myself. I have been stewing over how I'm actually going to talk with my daughter and how I'm going to be loving and welcoming with her so that we have a good conversation. (I was thinking I'd need some specific phrases etc. And today she called me on the phone! I have also been scouring the modules looking for help. And I found it in Nurture 6.1= FIXING FOCUSES ON THE PROBLEMS; ENCOURAGEMENT FOCUSES ON STRENGTHS! When I read that, I KNEW that I knew how to do that even with her!. What a breakthrough for me! So, my daughter was telling me that her husband does the laundry for them. "What a man!" I told her that he doesn't have to be macho. She told me more things and in response, I came up with a positive comment about every single thing she brought up. And we both we laughing and talking about the past and the future. She had told me early on in the conversation that she had only about 2 minutes to talk with me. But then SHE kept talking for the next 40 minutes. What a find the above phrase is. If this is the only thing I remember forever about this class, it will be well worth it! I've just struck gold!!! Thank you Catherine!

@Tracey Robison would you please reiterate the alternative response to “I did my best” you shared in the class. In addition to it being very triggering due to issues within my FOO (family of origin), my ACs have responded that it feels like excuse making and an unwillingness to take responsibility (dismissive) re the impact of my behaviors, and I cannot disagree with them. Thank you.