My win this week was forcing myself to go socialise with my friends who are mums. We went to soft play (think death slides, ball pits, indoor play centre) and it was such good medicine being surround by the uncomplicated joy of 5 year olds bumbling around bursting out laughing. It’s good to remember we can still play.

@Frederik Schaaf hahahah. My burnout mantra 😂

A win for me this week was hanging my master’s pic on the wall after graduating last month. Finishing that course last year nearly killed me but I saw it through! I just wish Mum were still here to see it.

@Frederik Schaaf yeah that’s true in a way isn’t it. Nice way to think of it so she’s still part of it.

I think a lot of us were never really part of the “bro” spaces. That made male friendships a bit complicated. Feeling othered by a lot of mainstream culture is quite isolating (absorbing heteronormative narratives and expectations all the time). Spending time actively hiding attraction. Being unsure if others you like are even gay. Lots of barriers. I think a lot of group connection things for better or worse are also decreasing in society. Places where social cohesion exists: pubs, church, community groups. It makes me think I should start volunteering to get a bit of that sort of social. I think there is also a bit of a culture clash that happens with childhood or teenage friends when we have grown up and a lot of the straight crew have families and talk about kids all the time. It creates a bit of a divide as well, not that gay couples can’t have kids, but personally I haven’t. Lots of small isolations

I think it can break down when things start to be misaligned. When things break down, you can often put them back together again. But… maybe the real break down is when things break and one of you doesn’t want to put it back together anymore.