Development in ND children 🧩
A lot of neurodivergent children don’t follow a straight developmental line. You can have a child who is reading well above their age, solving maths problems quickly… ...but then struggling to join a game, hold a back-and-forth conversation, or manage the social expectations of their year group. And that gap can become really noticeable around Year 2 (US: 1st Grade, age 6–7). Not because anything has “gone wrong”… but because the environment suddenly asks for more than just knowledge. 📚 It starts asking for: – independence – organisation – flexible thinking – social awareness – sustained effort on demand For children with AuDHD and a PDA profile, that’s a very different kind of load. 😩 So what can happen? A child who can do the work… starts to avoid it. A child who understands the lesson… doesn’t engage with it. A child who seems “fine” academically… begins to fall behind in practice Not because they’ve lost ability — but because the demands have outpaced their capacity in that moment. You might notice things like: • Your 8-year-old chatting more comfortably with younger children (e.g. Year 1 / US: Kindergarten, age 5–6) • Struggling with group dynamics their own age handle more easily • Avoiding tasks they can absolutely do at home • Big reactions to everyday expectations • Needing more support with starting, stopping, or shifting tasks That doesn’t mean they’re “behind.” It means their development is spiky. 🦔 Think of it like this: Their learning ability might be working at Year 4 or above (US: 3rd Grade, age 8–9)… while their executive functioning is closer to Year 1–2 (US: Kindergarten–1st Grade)… and their nervous system is trying to keep everything balanced in between. That’s a huge load for a child to carry. So when your child gravitates towards younger children socially? That often isn’t regression. It’s regulation. 🧘♀️ Younger children tend to: – place fewer social demands – be more direct and less complex – allow more flexibility in play