Some of the guys I work with make such an astonishing transformation that their before and after pictures are two completely different guys. Will is one of these. I won't share his personal secrets, but let's just say his upbringing did him no favours. He started on the back foot, without any good support or role models growing up. Like most introverted Nice Guys, he became the "wallflower" type, flying under the radar to avoid bullying, conflict and disapproval. But he was Will-ing to do something about it. Slowly, piece by piece, he replaced the people-pleasing and self-defeating elements of his life with confidence. He quit the comfortable job he'd slipped into based on connections and competence, and boldly struck out to develop a career that suited his values, experimenting with a vast range of activities to figure out who he really was. He started standing up for himself, particularly with his family, and also took up Brazilian Jiu Jitsu, to overcome his fear of conflict and confrontation. He can now assertively stand his ground with anyone. Will learned how to confidently find, approach and connect with women he's attracted to, eventually creating his first real relationship and an abundant love life with women of quality which he led and initiated, developing a non-needy and naturally calm social energy (best suited for introverts). Will has gone from strength to strength with determination, humility and bravery. He has earned his new life the hard way, and will now be a confident man indefinitely. My hat goes off to Will - he could easily coach others now.

Break some autopilot rules and patterns. We often follow patterns - rituals of behaviour - without any critical thinking about whether this is actually the best way to do things. Our brain prioritizes familiarity over efficiency or even success. You can train yourself to be more aware of the way you're doing things, and therefore more likely to make better decisions. Simply consciously break a pattern and do something a different way: - brush your teeth with your other hand - drive a new way to work - shop at a different supermarket, and buy different brands - pause before speaking instead of reacting instantly - introduce yourself to the person who works on the other side of the office Your challenge is to break a different pattern or rule every day, just to see what you notice. Enjoy!

Little confidence-boosting exercise for you: Write a list of all your achievements, as many as you can remember. Call it your Lifetime Achievements list. It might include sporting experiences, travel, school accomplishments, dating and relationship milestones, business and career wins... anything and everything that you did well and should be proud of. Don't diminish or qualify these in any way (i.e. don't say "I went travelling to USA but that was ages ago"). Comment below with your favourite from the list when you're done!

Today I want to recognize one of my former clients Tony. He came to me after breaking up with his long-term partner and feeling like he'd completely lost who he was. Years of Nice Guy Syndrome in a deteriorating marriage where he constantly compromised his needs to placate his wife had left him an empty shell and socially isolated. One thing I love about my work is seeing people recover from NGS quicker than me! Tony LEAPED into the work. Within a few conversations he was out meeting strangers, expressing attraction directly, and creating a love life he never imagined was possible. Then he took it a step further, quitting his safe trade job to pack everything up and travel to Asia. There he embraced a lifestyle of letting go of control and just backing himself to make bold decisions. Tony now knows who he is, what he wants from life, and who he'd like to spend that time with. One of the fastest transitions I've ever witnessed, because he was radically honest and extremely brave. Congrats to Tony - well earned!

Hey guys To celebrate and promote the upcoming Social Confidence Workshop, I'm giving away an old Body Language training tool I used in a previous workshop. Comment "confidence" below and I'll send it to you. Reminder: You must be a VIP member to join the workshop, which is on this Saturday! 👉 Upgrade your membership to VIP (Brotherhood) to join the Social Confidence Workshop here: https://www.skool.com/brojo-the-integrity-army-6491/plans