Boundary BS · The Rainbow Path

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Boundary BS

As we move into the last part of this year and this holiday season, many of us will be with family or others we consider family. Some will be in awesome environments, some of us will be in environments that test us as they do every year. So it's important to start looking at boundaries and why what you think you have in place is not the right thing for you. All your comments are welcome.

Why Boundary Books Don't Address Energy Leakage

You've probably read the boundary books. "No is a complete sentence." "You teach people how to treat you." "Stop people-pleasing."

It is good advice. But it doesn't work for empaths.

Because the problem isn't just psychological—it's energetic.

You can set a verbal boundary and still energetically merge with the person's disappointment. You can say no with your mouth and feel what they're feeling so intensely that you end up saying yes anyway, or punishing yourself for days afterward.

Traditional boundary work operates at the mental and behavioral level. It doesn't address the energetic bleeding that happens before you even open your mouth.

This is why you can read every boundary book ever written and still walk away from coffee with a friend feeling like you've been hit by a truck. The conversation was fine. The boundary was maintained. But energetically, you gave away the store.

What empaths need isn't better boundaries—it's energetic sovereignty. The ability to seal your field so that you can be compassionate without merging, present without absorbing, open without bleeding out.

I look at this as using filters to maintain that energetic sovereignty. And yes it requires work and choice to set the proper filters you need to remain intact.

2. That brings me to the Spiritual Bypass Trap: When "Love and Light" Makes It Worse!

This is why many, if not most, spiritual teachings fail empaths:

"Just send them love and light." "Raise your vibration and lower vibrations can't affect you." "If you're affected by someone's energy, you're not evolved enough."

This IS spiritual bypassing, and it's f**ing dangerous for empaths.

Because it puts the blame back on you. It says that if you're exhausted after taking care of your mother with dementia, you're just not spiritual enough. If you're overwhelmed by your narcissistic boss, you need to work on your consciousness.

And that is all Bullshit.

You're not failing at spirituality. You're dealing with a real energetic phenomenon that requires real tools, not platitudes. And in many cases you're dealing with people who have excelled at manipulation, passive aggressive behavior and it lands on you.

The "love and light" crowd will tell you that protection is fear-based, that building boundaries means you're closing your heart, that true spiritual mastery means being unaffected by anything.

They're ARE WRONG

Protection isn't fear—it's sovereignty. Boundaries aren't walls—they're integrity. And being affected by energy isn't a spiritual failing—it's being a friggin' human with a functional nervous system.

The path forward isn't transcendence. It's grounded, it's boundaries, it's filters, protected empathy. It's staying open-hearted while also staying intact. And anyone who tells you that's not spiritual enough has never actually lived as an unprotected empath.

We will continue this by looking at what to do to create your filters and boundaries.

Think about this and comment with thought and purpose.

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