Here is the story, I choose to share it because I know some of us may experience the same kind of scenario and we can learn from each other. I participated this week in a gathering where an renowned Apostole came. Before that I fasted, prayed and asked God to speak to me through him. I was able to free my schedule for the 2 days outpouring meetings. I was prepare, I was ready and nothing could stop me. I even asked God to touch the Apostole so he can call my name. So the expected day came I got there early, I even talkedwith one of the participant and make an agreement with her to viedo each other when we get call. Fueled with excitement and expectation I was all in. The waited moment came about and I let it passed me by. Someone else rushed in and claimed hers and I was standing there with a look of surprise questioning if it was really me that he called because in my asking I was to specific instead of letting God be God. I felt it was me he called upon and I let doubt take it away from me. During the rest of the 2 days I was hopping that he will call me again and that didn't happened. During this whole time until now, I had this feeling of lost, of missing something that I came closed to. I felt mad, pissed at myself and all.kind of emotions took over me. I was even having physically feeling of anxiety. I wrote to Nekesha this morning to get in contact with me because I was going through the feelings and I wanted it to stop, I wanted to understand why this happened. I will say Holly Spirit came upon me and reminded me to talk to my feelings, I took few deep breaths like Nekesha thought us and I repeated few times with my hand on my heart (Peace be still, and know that I am God (3 times). After few minutes I was working on something and to my amazement I realized that the uneasy feelings were gone. The lessons that came out of this whole thing is that I already know what I wanted the Apostole to tell me. It is like God telling me that I didn't needed the Apostole, I have all the answer within me. I don't need no one approval.