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Stop Sounding Like a Salesperson — Write Emails Like a Human
One of my clients used to rely 100% on cold calls. He was grinding. Burning dials. Seeing some success, but it was unpredictable. Then we layered in email into his prospecting outreach sequence. Nothing complicated — just better messaging, sent to the right people at the right time. No tools. No automation. Just sharper communication. Within two weeks, he started booking more meetings and became the most consistent top BDR at his company. How did he do it? By using my "RIVER" email framework: R – Relevance Why are you reaching out now? Tie it to a recent change, role, or shift. I – Insight What did you find in your research? Show them you actually looked. V – Value Gap What common friction are they likely dealing with? E – Effect What’s the impact if that friction continues? R – Recommendation Suggest a helpful action. One CTA. Make it easy. Here's an example email (using The RIVER Framework). Subject Line: expense chaos Hey [First Name], (R) Just called and left you a voicemail. Saw you're leading finance over at [Company], and noticed your team’s been scaling fast. (I) When teams grow that quickly, expense reporting usually gets... messy. Especially when employees still chase receipts or submit reports late. (V) That often leads to end-of-month headaches, delayed closes, and frustrated finance teams. (E) At Divvy, we simplify this by automating expenses down to just a few taps — and we do it at no cost. (R) Would you be open to exploring if this could save your team time and stress? [SIGNATURE] Use this framework to build cold sales emails that feel personal — and scalable. Something you can actually rinse and repeat without sounding like a robot. 🎯Here's a challenge for everybody in this community: Write 2 cold emails using the RIVER Method. Then — pick your favorite one and drop it in the comments. I’ll personally review it and give you feedback. Let’s stop blasting emails and start sending ones that actually matter to the person reading them.
Want to Crush It as a Sales Rep? Do. This. Every. Day.
Here’s your daily game plan to actually dominate your pipeline (and avoid doom-scrolling LinkedIn for "motivation"). Fill these three buckets every day, and watch what happens. Bucket 1: Prospect Like a Pro - Pick 5 new accounts to target. (Yeah, actually new ones. Stop recycling through the same ones.) - Find 3-5 contacts at each account. Time to play detective - Sales Navigator is your BFF here. - Craft 5 legit POVs on WHY you actually care about reaching out to these accounts. - Now, go HAM. Send 15-20 tailored-as-hell emails, make 15-20 dials, and fire off 15-20 LinkedIn connection requests. Bucket 2: Work Your Active Deals - Look at your pipeline like a skeptic. Ask yourself, “What could blow this deal up?” (Be honest. If you’re not sweating the answer, you’re not thinking hard enough.) - Multi-thread every single deal. Send one email to loop in someone new. A silent champion? A blocker? Get creative. - Drop one solid "value touch" to your champion. “Hey, saw this and thought of you” kind of vibes. Make them feel the love. Bucket 3: Snag the Low-Hanging Fruit - Hit up every closed/lost opportunity and ask, “Is it time to chat again?” People change, budgets reappear, and maybe they just weren’t ready back then. - Speaking of change... reach out to everyone who just switched jobs from your past customers. New role? New budget? New opportunities. (If you have ZoomInfo, use their "Tracker" tool.) - Use Sales Navigator to find 5 warm intros. (Referrals = liquid gold.) Why This Works Sales is a numbers game, but it’s also a quality game. If you check off these buckets daily, you’re hitting the holy trinity of sales success: 1. New opportunities. 2. Active deals moving forward. 3. "Forgotten" leads resurfacing. TL;DR Fill all three buckets, daily. These are the "prioritized sales activities" you must focus on. Buckets filled = easy productivity. Your quota will thank you. Go forth and crush it. 💪
Tips for crafting sales emails that connect AND convert
Knowing how to write compelling and persuasive emails is one of the most important skills a salesperson can develop. But let's be real, it’s easier said than done. Here's a handful of 'best practices' you can apply to ANY type of email. Grab their attention with a short subject line: (3-5 words max). No caps, keep it chill. I love using "+" signs in my subject lines... Example: "risk management + question" Make it about THEM, not you: Swap out “I” for “You”. Beware of using “We” and “Us” Your prospect doesn’t care about you...yet. Focus on THEIR needs first! Eliminate the fluff: Keep it short and sweet. Be direct and get straight to the point. Long-winded emails? Ain’t nobody got time for that! Make it conversational: Use simpler words, fewer words per sentence. Think like a 3rd grader - Dumb. It. Down. Data shows this works. Who knew?! Tone matters: Write with a slightly positive tone. Not too much, just right. Words like “great” and “wonderful” boost response rates by 10-15%. But, beware of excessive exclamation points!!!! Mirror their verbiage, structure, and punctuation: Once they respond, lock onto their style and mirror it. Use their words, match their format, copy their punctuation. It’s like being a chameleon, but with words! Getting REALLY good at communicating through email takes practice, but trust me, it’s worth it. Got other email tips? Drop them in the comments. 👇
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Feedback?
Hi closers! I'm taking on a new project, bringing disruptive technology to the avocado business. The avocado is what's sold and not the technology, and we want to pique interest in scheduling a meeting while keeping the product details under wraps. What do you guys think about this message as an intro? -- Hi buyer, I noticed avocados are an essential piece of your supply chain. My name is Fernando, and I’m with Avo Foods. We are introducing a product to revolutionize the avocado industry—hint: fresh-cut avocados with a very long shelf life. Our disruptive avocados will allow you to save on costs and reduce risk through transporting and storing efficiencies, waste reduction, and increased operational safety. These avocados display all the incredible features everyone loves while alleviating many of the headaches of managing its supply chain. If it sounds exciting to have your avocados fresh and ripe when you need them, we’d like to show you more and get samples into your hands. These avocados are so unbelievable that you must see them in person! When would you be open to meeting and seeing more in person? Thanks for your time, and I look forward to chatting with you soon. -- Would love to hear what you think! Thanks in advance.
Vinnie's Feedback: Fernando's Cold Sales Email
Hey Closers, @Fernando Garcia posted to this group a few days back asking for feedback on a cold sales email he's going to be sending to prospects. I attached a picture to this post that shows my version of a cold sales email. It's a simple 4-step framework: 1. Subject line. Boring and straightforward. 1 to 4 words max. 2. Problem. The 1st sentence is a question about the problem you solve. 3. Impact. The 2nd sentence is context on the impact the problem has. 4. Solution + CTA. Combine an interest-based CTA with your solution. To reference, here's Fernando's original email: Hi buyer, I noticed avocados are an essential piece of your supply chain. My name is Fernando, and I’m with Avo Foods. We are introducing a product to revolutionize the avocado industry—hint: fresh-cut avocados with a very long shelf life. Our disruptive avocados will allow you to save on costs and reduce risk through transporting and storing efficiencies, waste reduction, and increased operational safety. These avocados display all the incredible features everyone loves while alleviating many of the headaches of managing its supply chain. If it sounds exciting to have your avocados fresh and ripe when you need them, we’d like to show you more and get samples into your hands. These avocados are so unbelievable that you must see them in person! When would you be open to meeting and seeing more in person? Thanks for your time, and I look forward to chatting with you soon. ---- Post below with any questions/feedback you have on this topic. Hope that helps!
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Vinnie's Feedback: Fernando's Cold Sales Email
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