Remembering Who I Was (before the world told me who to be)

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Apr 28 (edited) • Stories of Transformation

For most of my life, I lived between two worlds.

There was the world everyone seemed to accept... the logical, girl-boss, hustle-and-grind world of NYC, where sensitivity was a flaw and intuition was a liability.

And then there was the other world...the one that was always quietly calling me to come home to myself. But I didn't know how to answer that call. Not yet.

I was always moving...through countries, careers, and identities. My external life looked successful on the surface, but I knew I was holding it together with superglue and hope.

My body eventually decided for me. Fibromyalgia. Chronic pain. A fog that made existing feel like an effort. My nervous system stopped cooperating with the life I was living.

So I did what a lot of us do. I went looking for someone else to fix me.

I tried everything. Traveled to sacred sites. Sat in circles. Studied shamanism, energy work...even walked on fire. I was doing ALL THE RIGHT THINGS...or so I thought.

I'd left the corporate world that told me my intuition was a liability, and walked straight into a spiritual community that told me my healing depended on someone else. Different packaging. Same pattern. Same dynamic.

Here's the thing. I had already found Reiki (or Reiki had found me). I'd been practicing it for years...just not on myself. I had the technology in my hands, and I kept looking for something better, something more, someone who could unlock what I clearly couldn't unlock myself.

One evening at a Reiki healing circle, something finally landed.

I had been chasing a magic healing pill instead of doing the work.

That was my moment. Not a discovery that changed the trajectory of my life overnight...a decision that would shape my future. I stopped collecting certifications and modalities. I stopped looking for a guru who would show me the way. I committed to a daily Reiki practice in my actual life. Not a retreat version. Not a TikTok version. The real one. Showing up for myself every day.

The pain began to ease. The fog started to lift. My sensitivity, which I'd spent years trying to manage or suppress, became information I could actually work with.

Reiki didn't fix me. It helped me to remember that I wasn't broken to begin with.

Reiki met me exactly where I was. It didn’t ask me to believe. It asked me to practice. To slow down. To listen. To stop outsourcing my healing and learn how to work with my own energy inside my real, everyday life.

It gave me a system that honored my sensitivity without turning it into bypassing, and structure without forcing me into burnout. For the first time, my sensitivity became a strength, and my intuition became something I trusted.

Reiki showed me that healing is not about fixing yourself.

It is about remembering how to return to yourself.

That realization eventually led me to create Reiki DAO Collective.

I knew I wasn’t the only one navigating this transition. There are so many of us... sensitives, healers, intuitives, and lightworkers who were never meant to survive in a world built on speed and suppression.

In many ways, Reiki has been just the beginning of my story.

AND... I believe that transformation stores aren't often a straightforward journey, a defining moment, or an overnight miracle. Transformation isn't a line, with a clear beginning and end... It's a spiral.

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