Tip #3/4 for reaching an avoidant spouse (a self-care move)

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Resist the story spiral!

The moment my husband would go into silent mode, my mind would instantly launch into all kinds of stories I would start telling myself. The first one would typically be "he doesn't love me anymore" followed by "I'm not enough for him" followed by "I've done something wrong...again..."

You get the idea.

But here's what I found (by practice - not just as a wife but also as a coach and someone now trained in helping others rewire their internal belief system):

🧠The mind listens! The human brain cannot distinguish between objective truth, and what you tell it.

It works TIRELESSLY to make your internal dialogue your physical and emotional reality.

That internal narrative pattern I used to have had less to do with my husband and more to do with my own belief system shaped by experiences from my past.

We are already prone to telling ourselves negative things, and so a conscious reframe is telling ourselves a DIFFERENT and better story than the negative one.

"I AM enough for him. Right now he's struggling to find words to talk through what's going on."

"This is a temporary challenge, and I have the resilience to handle it."

"I trust myself to handle whatever happens, and I let go of the rest."

It takes practice because it doesn't come naturally. But like building a muscle - you get strong with it.

So - here's a question for you. What's a repeating negative belief that you want to develop a 'conscious reframe' with? Let me know in the comments below and we can shape a present tense and powerful reframe!

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Tip #3/4 for reaching an avoidant spouse (a self-care move)