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10d (edited) • Intellectual/Personal Growth💡
The Audacity to Give a Damn: Why Caring Matters
I almost titled this "The Subtle Art of Giving a F**k" , hahaha, crack myself up.
We seem to be getting mixed messages from the world... We hear things like,“Don’t care so much" , “You’re too sensitive", “You’re too invested", "It's not that deep". On the flip side we also hear, "Why don't you care?" , "You seem cold", "You're so detached", "You're checked out".
Somehow, caring too much is a flaw...also, not caring enough is also a flaw. So, where is the line?
Why “Caring Too Much” Gets a Bad Reputation
When people say someone cares too much what they often mean is that they think that a person is too emotionally affected, too invested in outcomes, taking things personally, showing one's heart...Basically, that they're emotionally exposing themselves too much. Caring will absolutely open us up to disappoitnment, rejection, loss, embarassment, grief...some uncomfortable emotions.
It means that the nervous system doesn't get to just sit comfortably on autopilot--it means that there's an opportunity to feel things more fully. But here's the thing....caring deeply is often confused with lacking boundaries and they are really not the same at all...
You can care deeply (be open to emotional exposure) AND still say no, walk away, hold standards, and protect your peace. The issue isn't caring. It's caring without self regulation and self respect.
Why Not Caring Isn’t the Flex We Think It Is
On the other end, detachment is often praised. How often have you heard (or maybe said to yourself) “Nothing bothers me.”,“I don’t care.”,“It is what it is.”. There can be a lot of power in that stance, especially if you've been hurt before. Likely this stance came as a result of being hurt before. Emotional neutrality can feel like safety, but is it really? Long term indifference has a cost...When we stop caring to avoid pain, we also end up muting things like joy, passion, meaning, and connection. These are things that are life giving. While not caring/indifference can protect you from heartbreak, it also protects you from depth. It might feel efficient and stable, but it often falls flat. We kind of lose our life energy. Protecting our peace can be valid, but sometimes we're masquerading and really just protecting our ego.
Caring Is a Form of Courage
To care is to say "this matters to me", "YOU matter to me", "I am willing to risk/face discomfort for something meanigful". That to me signals bravery...not weakness.
Caring fuels social change, art, relationships, growth..and...integrity. Meaningful movements in history started because someone cared enough to be uncomfortable. Meaningful relationships deepen because someone dared enough to stay emotionally present. I'm thankful for this.
So maybe the balance isn't about caring less, but maybe it's about caring wisely. Care with boundaries. Care without abandoning yourself in the process. Care without making someone else your emotional oxygen supply. Be invested without being consumed. Feel deeply and still be grounded. Let things matter and let yourself matter too. :)
In a world that seems to value indifference and detachment and in a culture that often confuses numbness with strength...be rebellious and have the audacity to give a damn.
POLL: Which one do you struggle with more?
QUESTIONS: What have been some positive examples of you/others caring?
ACTION:
This week, pick one thing you actually care about (a relationship, a goal, a value) and stop minimizing it.
No playing it cool. No saying "it's not that serious"... Be honest and say: “This matters to me.”
Then watch what happens when you stop shrinking your depth to make other people comfortable.
Caring isn’t embarrassing but it can be painful...but living half-invested? that's life sucking type of embarassment.
Caring too much and feeling emotionally drained
Pretending not to care to avoid vulnerability or protect myself in some way
Swinging between the two
I have found a healthy balance: I care in a very healthy way
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The Audacity to Give a Damn: Why Caring Matters
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