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December: We don't need January's permission slip...
Greetings fellow empowered beings!! :) As we're approaching this last month, let's take a look at the past year (things we've achieved, lessons we've learned, things we've left behind and added) and let's use that to mobilize us in this next month. Let's use this last month of the year to build momentum and get a running start into 2026. We don't have to wait.... We treat January like it has magical powers when really it is just a month with better PR. Psychologically speaking, December is prime time for momentum building. It is the month where the brain naturally shifts into reflection mode, which means insight is already simmering and it might make it the perfect time to launch! A lot of people experience SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder) in the winter months--- so I think that it's really really important to look at the habits that we engage in and how this either contributes, reinforces or helps ease this effect. (side note--with my clients in Michigan, I start having conversations about this in September because the weather here along with the habits really influence people's experiences for 6 months at a time!! We can't control the weather, BUT we can do things differently). *****So, how are you using December and what are your intentions? *****How will you use this past year as a way to move into the next? Here are some questions to consider as you look back on your past year (questions are part of an AAR (After Action Review). 1. What did we intend to accomplish (what was our strategy)? 2. What did we do (how did we execute relative to our strategy)? 3. Why did it happen that way (why was there a difference between strategy and execution)? 4. What will we do to adapt our strategy or refine our execution for a better outcome OR how do we repeat our success?
December: We don't need January's permission slip...
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Favorite books or current reads!
I'd love to get a list going of people's favorite books or current reads! (or if you've written a book yourself, feel free to share that as well!). If you'd be so inclined, please feel free to share in this space. Also, if there's a book you would NOT recommend, share that too. I'm curious! My current reads: The Bible-trying to make this a daily habit Podvig Catch-22 Why the kids aren't growing up Soundtracks People of the Lie Thinking Fast and Slow Pissed Off With a Purpose: Waging War on Fear My most recent reads: An Arsenal of Gratitude-Waging War on Mediocrity and Regret (shoutout to @Dan 'Remmy' Stourac --it's written by him and it's amazing!!). Dune Crazy busy The Great Alone In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts: Close Encounters with Addictions Fight Club Scattered Minds: The Origins and Healing of Attention Deficit Disorder Disappointment with God Kasher in the Rye (NOT to be confused with Catcher in the Rye) Favorite Books: Man's Search for meaning-viktor frankl Elements-Transfiguration of Elijah -anonymous priest in the oriental orthodox church Daring Greatly (and a bunch of Brene Brown's other work--Gifts of Imperfection; I thought it was just me but it wasn't; Braving the Wilderness) Screwtape Letters and the Great Divorce by C.S. Lewis Atomic Habits Brother's Karamazov and Crime and Punishment by Dostoevsky Welcome to the Orthodox Church by Fredericka Matthews Greene (I'll continue adding, these are just top of mind right now! ) Thank you for the inspiration @Dan 'Remmy' Stourac Please add to the list: @Aleksandra Nedelkoski @Anastasia Cocioaba @Andres Mateo @George Arhip @Loren Angelo @Britni Burton @Tim Blacke @Christa Lovas @Anastasia Cocioaba @LaTanya Carter @Dan 'Remmy' Stourac @David Pepper @David Pepper @Dayna Kanouna @Dr. Melissa Partaka @John D @Rachel Featherstone @Julia Groth @William Guy @Kimberly Poirier @Lisa Papiez @Lisa Vanderveen @Mary Seguin @Michael Mcknight @Michelle Mann @Moni Matysiak @Rina Maniou @Ronnie McCabe @Peter Oconnell @Ruth aka Grace Rose @Ryanne Ryan @Tracy Stewart @Adriana Filip @Jennifer Chatle @Anna Lh @Brittany Hone @Chris Wendt @Jose Colon @Yvonne Green @Linda Short @Nicole Johnson @Julie Nelson @Stephanie Riley @Tharuk M @Vasi Smith @Wesley Penner @Chris Wendt
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🌟 New to the community? Start here! 🌟
Hello! 😀 Welcome to a community that will serve to empower you to live your most fulfilled life! Excited for us to be part of a supportive environment where we will be encouraged to explore and increase self-awareness, gain perspective, develop insight, take action and thrive through our journey in life. ♥ I believe that you have value and worth and who you are as a person matters and this will guide many of the posts that you will see. Posts will take into consideration the different dimensions of life: social, emotional, intellectual, physical, spiritual, occupational, etc. 💡You are welcome and ENCOURAGED to share material, insights, inspirations, questions, and anything that you think that will be helpful towards growth.💡 ❤️Let's live wholeheartedly and with intention!!! ❤️ So honored to be part of this journey with you! Thank you for allowing me to be part of it. 🙂 🌟Please introduce yourself and also share something that brings you joy and makes you feel alive🌟 added: share some topics that interest you-- this will help guide some of the content!!🔥 ***Feel free to self promote either here or under the life wins category***
Talk to Yourself Like You're Not Being Held Hostage
Caught myself thinking about all the things that "I have" to do today. The reality is that, I don't "have to do anything". I "get to" or "I choose to" and in some cases, I even "want to". @Joshua Haag and I must have been on some kind of similar wavelength because after thinking about this and how I could incorporate it in a post, I saw his own IG post regarding 'get to' language. Notice the difference between saying “I have to do this” and “I get to do this” or “I choose to do this.” Same action, totally different internal experience. And your brain absolutely notices! What’s actually going on psychologically? “I have to” frames an action as a demand or threat. Your brain tends to interpret this as a loss of control. That can activate stress responses, especially in the amygdala, the part of the brain that scans for danger and pressure. When that happens, motivation drops and resistance increases, even if the task itself is small. ******“I get to” or “I choose to” shifts the frame to agency. Yay FREEDOM!! This engages parts of the prefrontal cortex, which is involved in decision-making, meaning, and long-term thinking. Instead of feeling coerced, your brain feels like it is participating. That sense of choice boosts intrinsic motivation and reduces stress.***** Choice language matters beeecause: 1)It restores a sense of autonomy, which humans are wired to crave 2) It reduces threat perception and stress hormones 3)It increases follow-through because the action feels self-directed. 4) also...It builds identity. You are someone who chooses, not someone who is pushed or coerced. *This is not about toxic positivity or pretending everything is amazing. Forget that noise. Sometimes things are annoying, boring, or genuinely hard. The shift is about acknowledging reality while also reclaiming agency. You can still dislike something and choose it at the same time! :) (the video talks about the paradox of choice---talks about how choice has made us more paralyzed as opposed to more free...I may add this video to a different topic later on but I liked that it touched on freedom and in this way it is relates to today's topic).
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🌄Sonder and Perspective Taking
I've been thinking about other people's lives a lot this past week--especially as we encounter the holiday season. Sonder is the realization that every person you pass has a life as complex and vivid as your own. The 'main character' of their own stories but also the 'side characters' of many more. Strangers in a strange land. Each person is carrying unseen stories, responsibilities,grief, joys,hopes, disappointments... Perspective taking is the skill of holding that awareness without losing yourself. It does not mean excusing behavior but it does mean understanding context. When we practice sonder, we soften assumptions and we interrupt our reactivity and postpone our judgments. We make room for curiosity. This shift can change how we interpret conflict, misunderstandings, and silence. It can change a moment from aggression/reaction to something more peaceful. It can help us step outside of ourselves. Question to ponder: What might shift if you paused to consider that someone else’s behavior is shaped by a story you cannot see? Poll: How do you manage interpersonal challenges?
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