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25d (edited) • $/Generativity(life's calling)
Principles of Success (Day 7: RELATIONSHIPS💗 ) my favorite...
In the past few days we spoke about the first 6 principles of success as described in "The Rhythm of Life" by Matthew Kelly (more here : day-1-purpose; day-2-priorities; day-3-balance; day-4-discipline; day-5-growth;-day-6-faith). Today we delve into the seventh principle: Relationships
(Just a small but important note, the term success here can be applied to many areas of life, and ultimately, it's really just about intentionally becoming the best version of yourself.)
I love the Brene Brown video...
PRINCIPLE 7: RELATIONSHIPS
“No one becomes great on their own.”
If you know me, you know how much connection/relationships matter. Connection is a top value for me and so there's an extra appreciation for this principle.
In the book, we are reminded that success is incomplete if it costs us our relationships because achievement/hustling/ambition at the expense of connection and intimacy eventually ends up collapsing into loneliness, burnout or emptiness. From a psychological perspective this makes sense because we are wired for connection--our nevous systems regulate thorugh safe relationships, not throrugh accomplishments. I also want to point out that it's not just relationships with others but also the relationship that we have with ourselves!!
Relationships also shape identity. The people closest to us either raise our standards or lower them. Kelly stresses that greatness is never a solo project-it is formed through encouragement, challenge, and accountability. Even when we think that we've done something on ourr own, there aer often times people that have been part of the process.
We talked about rhythm before with some of the other principles... Relationships also require rhythm. There are seasons of deep engagement and some that have less, BUT neglect disguised as ambition slowly erodes trust. Consistency and some level of predictability in relationships is important (this doesn't mean that there's no novelty--just the ability to know that you're safe in a relationship) The quality of your relationships often mirrors the quality of your inner life: how you manage stress, boundaries, vulnerability, and empathy. Sometimes we need to evaluate/re-evaluate our connections--maintaining connections at the cost of other things may not be a good balance either...It's an opportunity to be intentional with our relationships and with our goals! :)
POLL: How Healthy Are Your Relationships Right Now?
Questions to ponder:
- Which relationships most shape your life right now?
- Are any of your relationships paying the price for your busyness or stress?
- Do you treat relationships as essential or as optional once everything else is handled?
- How do you typically respond to conflict: withdraw, defend, fix, or repair?
- What does success cost you relationally and is that cost worth it?
7-Day Relationship Recalibration Challenge (I asked ChatGPT for help on this one!)
Day 1 – Notice-Identify one relationship you’ve been neglecting or taking for granted.
Day 2 – Reach Out-Send a message or make a call with no agenda except connection.
Day 3 – Listen-Have one conversation where your only goal is to understand.
Day 4 – Repair-Acknowledge a small hurt, misunderstanding, or absence (without defending yourself)
Day 5 – Appreciate-Name something specific you value about that person.
Day 6 – Create Rhythm-Set a realistic, repeatable point of connection (weekly check-in, walk, meal).
Day 7 – Reflect-Ask yourself: What changed when I treated relationship as success, not an accessory to it?
CHALLENGE: Have a meaningful conversation with someone today! :)
Strong, mutual, and life giving
Mostly good, but undernourished
Functional but emotionally distant
Strained by stress, busyness, or resentment
avoided or neglected as of late
Intentionally being repaired
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Principles of Success (Day 7: RELATIONSHIPS💗 ) my favorite...
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