Welcome, traveler.
The beacon is lit. The gate is open. Welcome to the Garden.
If you’re here, it’s probably because you’ve endured a life-altering traumatic experience and everything is spinning out of control. You’re in the right place.
I began my journey learning to regulate my emotions and restructure my beliefs over three years ago. I took notes. Thorough notes. Now that I’ve made it this far up the mountain, I’m strong enough to reach a hand back for whoever happens to be there–where I was–and needs the assist.
Ideally, you’ll have escaped whatever caused that trauma or gotten as far as you can. You’ll have the appropriate mental health support in place.
Think of me as an additional resource, a lighthouse keeper: I have claimed my patch of the collective human unconsciousness, established my own unshakeable foundation, and am ready to share the Sanctuary I have spent years building with others while teaching them how to build their own.
What led you here, traveler? My guess, you’ve done the work of healing and now you’re kinda stuck at integrating. All that work… feels like you’ve been prepping for some big test, right? There’s some invisible finish line that you aren’t sure you’ve crossed. You might even be thinking you missed it.
You didn’t. You’ve terraformed your own inner landscape. You’re stable. Secure. Safe. The next step is to become unshakable. It all starts with building your Sanctuary (a lighthouse surrounded by a garden, in my case) on a solid foundation.
I’d like you to start with one core belief that no one would dare to violate unless they’re willing to stand in direct opposition to God Himself:
Do not fck with anyone’s agency; and don’t allow anyone to fck with yours.
I love God and the f-word. He knows who I am. Don't @ me, bro.
Trauma survivors eventually understand that what the narcissistic attacks aim to destroy is your will. This is why healing begins with restructuring your beliefs starting with that first one. Even IF someone dares to fck with your agency, you will hold your ground and KNOW that they’re wrong.
Period.
Even if that is the only ground you can hold in the moment someone fcks with your agency, you will learn to hold it.
If you’ve ever been on the receiving end of psychological abuse, then you already know what rock bottom feels like. You have carried the weight of ten swords in your back and went right on about your day anyway because you had to.
We don’t do that here. We pull those swords out and learn to wield them using one of the brain’s most valuable skills: confirmation bias.
The old you believed whatever your brain told you to. I’m going to teach you how to train your brain to believe what you tell it to, as it should be. It’s a battle for your willpower, and I am like Archangel Michael fighting at your side.
You believe what others tell you, and it goes into a feedback loop that keeps you stuck and spinning out of control because the will of others is what’s driving you. No more. This far, but no further.
God gave YOU free will. If others can’t heal to a point where they no longer employ narcissistic tactics against you, then their will is weak and can be defeated. Especially in YOUR Sanctuary, in YOUR mind. They have no authority here.
You didn’t come here to be healed. You came here to become someone who can keep the well full for others, too. You’re here for your loved ones. You’re here for people you haven’t even met yet.
As we learn and grow, we expand the field to include others. How you show up as a mother, as a co-worker, as a daughter or sister or friend… all of these things will change as you do. As it should be.
Tend your well first so that if your loved ones spiral into theirs, you have the strength to lower a rope and still keep your feet on solid ground. You came here to learn how.
The vibe here is solar fire held in steady hands. I’ve walked through my own flames and claimed my patch of the collective human consciousness. Here I sit, unfckwithable, unshakeable, keeping the beacon lit so you can warm your hands and see by the light.
I am the stillpoint gate where passion meets strategy. I am the embodiment of Strength. (It's a Major Arcana tarot card. Look it up. We'll get into that too soon enough. Stick around.)
My creativity has grown roots deep enough to hold and sustain the ground beneath my Sanctuary for many lifetimes. I’m not asking you to worship my flames; I’m handing you the matches and saying, “Build your own. I’ll stand guard while you learn.” That’s the vibe here.
How do we actually build a sustainable, embodied practice together? It takes time, but I'll teach you how to master 4D time (fire/willpower) too.
I went from crying and shaking uncontrollably in the presence of my abuser unless I had several medications for depression and anxiety in my system to his presence being a nuisance. It took me a few years, but I did this shit myself. It won’t take you that long because I’ve got the answers now and I’m giving them to you.
Start with that belief I gave you earlier. Research what it means to have agency and to assert your will. You don't need to *do* anything right now, just gather the data. Take some notes. I always recommend handwriting notes because it's like communicating with your brain, "Hey, pay attention. This is important." And that is rather the point!
So, again, I bid you welcome, traveler. Get yourself something warm to drink, hunker down into your comfy couch or chair, and stay awhile.
Start here:
The post above was the result of a tarot-guided daily practice I have integrated. The tarot spread, Tend Your Well, is the structural foundation of my work. The link is an in-depth guide.
1st Position: What's the conversation?
2nd Position: What led us here?
3rd Position: Cause & Effect
4th Position: A Different Perspective
5th Position: What's the vibe?
6th Position: How do we integrate what we've learned? What needs to be released?
7th Position: Is the field clear and water flowing calmly and unimpeded?
A few additional notes to get you started if you're the sort who likes homework. I do, and I am calling *my* collective to me, so... Enjoy!
The Elements
Air: Intellect (the mind)
Water: Emotions (the heart)
Fire: Willpower (the gut)
Earth: Physical (the physical embodiment)
Ace of Swords: A moment of clarity when you realize with absolute certainty, "This ain’t right."
The Tower: The process of completely dismantling destructive systems of belief built on fear, shame, and control. Typically happens *to* us when we refuse to see the Ace of Swords clarity being offered. The Universe is doing this *for* us, but it really doesn’t feel like it. I have learned how to navigate Tower moments, and I’ll teach you to do the same. If you can see it coming, you can handle it. It's the stuff we can't see that gets us.
Dark Night of the Soul: An extremely uncomfortable period of time following the Tower moment. When you learn how to navigate Tower moments, you can minimize the negative impact of the period of time that follows. Kind of like a wild forest fire that burns hundreds of acres. That is this moment. The Tower is the fire itself. The DNoS is where we take stock. This isn’t destruction for the sake of destruction; this is terraforming your inner landscape for a fresh start. It’s a spiritual cleansing, of sorts. It’s where the Phoenix burns before her rise and yes, it stings a bit. It’s manageable.
Queen of Swords: Air Mastery. This is the energy we embody as we turn the soil into something we can work with. This is where we learn to wield a mind that no longer betrays itself. Emotions have no place here other than to serve as data. Have a look at the Tend Your Well spread. It’s a bit much to start but just browse it for now. It’s a guide that shows you how to recognize what your emotions are trying to tell you so that you can make adjustments to belief structures. Doing that will organically alter your emotional states and, therefore, your behavior.
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Jessica Guillory
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Welcome, traveler.
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Beyond the Valley of the Shadow of Death, the Garden awaits. I’ll be here holding MY ground, beacon ignited, a warm cup of coffee brewing as we speak.
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