To me and possibly others: Music isn't always a distraction. It actually HELPS me focus, because it quiets the internal distractions 🥰 Sometimes, being mindful IS turning on music while washing the dishes. I actually SAW much more when I did this.. it blew me away! Hope this helps! Wanted to note it before I forgot🥰

As "crunch time" gets more and more intense wjth end of year almost here which means Lilly is gone for summer which is obviously emotional etc.. I've realized I need to support my nervous system even more. So that being said, I'm taking my new morning routine and changing the sequence. I'm now going to go outside FIRST. I thought 9 am would be early enough, and it might be, but the fact is that all the other steps I was doing before it, while in an environment that my nervous system sees as just ENDLESS demands and triggers and messes etc.. I was harming myself more than I realized. I WAS doing it, but it was costing me so much. And I didn't make the connection. But now I do. So that being said, the new sequence will be 7 am- get up. Put on clothes that can be worn for a short walk. Go downstairs. Put on hat. Make coffee and add two scoops protein. Drink water. 7:30 will be the "cue" to head out. 5 minutes out, then walk back. So essentially a 10 minute walk. You KNOW I want to do more😅, but I am easing back into it so I do it without harming myself this time 😅 Anyway, I was surprised at how challenging this feels to change the order.. but in reality obviously I'm allowed to. But yeah. I wanted to make sure I wasn't doing the adhd thing of "this is boring need to switch up" because it didn't feel boring. It felt unnecessarily hard. But now I see why. This summer, I will actually have time and space to address the root causes. But for right now, this is a step i CAN take. And I will. This way, if I end up crying that day, I will know it isnt just because I haven't gotten to be outside. If that makes sense. Love you guys! Let me know any "pivots" you might be able to do that could possibly help you 🥰

It is Saturday morning here. But I'm realizing something about myself. I WANT to do routines every day. As long as I'm a single mom with very little help, I'm realizing how routines HELP me. That being said, I'm reminding myself I'm not on a TIME crunch today but still want to do routine. That being said, I wrote it out and am STILL struggling so this is a reminder for me and others that if our brains have to read a list in order to do it, that is ok!! Anyway! I have timers set and music playing. Next up for me is making breakfast! Love you guys!!

Well, I'm grateful to say that I DID implement the new idea of bedtime to myself. I'm not saying I fell asleep right away because I didn't. Or that I slept deeper, because I don't know. But I DO know that I had dreams. And I didn't wake up in pain because an earbud was still in 😅 So, I'm going to call it a win 🤣

I'm continuing my morning routine. Ooh! I just had something come to me!! "We don't need to get the trauma on board for us to move forward. We just need to get the traumatized parts on board" In other words, we don't NEED resolution or an apology or reconciliation, in order to move forward. But we DO need to make sure we bring those pieces of ourselves. These might be uphill days. But as long as we keep climbing, we are winning 🥰 Love you guys!