I had the blood running in me to tell my parents about a potential spouse I met on an app. We exchanged questions about 3-4 days and I managed to pull him out of the app. In summary I asked what I needed and requested that if we want to know each other more it would be under the roof of my father. I managed to get him out of the chat and he is asking to see my father and me in the next weeks. The man made statements, that seemed trustworthy, indicating he strictly practices, stands in a well raised family and wants to be the provider of me and my kids. I feared the idea of remarriage but said I should give him a shot. I feared my parents reaction whom subhanAllah were open minded to it but there is a fish line stuck in our throats. 1) the man is of a different arab nation than ours. 2) my family fear that my ex ( who is a deadbeat dad that has not sent child support or utilized visitation or called the kids in 2 years and is unfortunately far from Allah) will force them back to him as they say he has all the right not allowing the girls live with a stranger. The man is a pediatrician which allowed my heart to rest. And his willingness to provide for the kids was reassuring as of now. My parents tore me apart having to think that I have to chose between remarrying or my kids.

I feel like it’s safe to say that at this point, we’ve all made du’a for marriage and a lot of us might be feeling that Al-Mujeeb hasn’t answered our du’a yet. But I was just reflecting on that name with a group of sisters and realized that there’s so many times that I was making du’a and felt like it was not getting answered and then I now look back and realize that what I have today are answers to du’as I made a while back, years ago even. With that being said, I have a friend that got married in her mid-30s who I ask her for advice on staying patient while waiting for my marriage du’a to be answered. She said that now that she looks back, it made perfect sense that both her and her husband had to go through certain life events in order to be prepared for each other and what their marriage would look like. She said that a few years prior, if he had proposed, she wouldn’t have accepted the proposal but because of certain circumstances that they each had to go through SEPARATELY in order to become the people they needed to be for each other, they now make perfect sense for each other and compliment each other so well. Allahuma barik their relationship is so beautiful mashallah TabarakAllah. So all this to say, trust in Allah’s timing. Trust in the preparation that Al-Aleem is doing for both you and your future spouse to be ready for each other. I needed this reminder today and wanted to share in hopes that it keeps you going as well. And trust that whatever is meant for you won’t miss you, so if you’re not ready to accept what he decreed is good for you, he is molding you to receive that gift soon inshallah! May Allah Al-Mujeeb answer all your du’as in ways beyond your wildest imagination!

As salaamualaykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh <3 I hope you all are well inshaaAllah :) As inspired by the recent MM video and some others, I have decided to try my hand at coming up with some vetting questions, mashaaAllah. To the trained eye, there is probably much that I can improve on! Nonetheless, I decided to share; as usual feel free to give feedback or use/take inspiration if you find anything useful or want to develop from. I haven't accessed MM's list which I can imagine is excellent and worth it; these are just some I thought of recently which will hopefully improve/develop over time inshaaAllah Its definitely not a complete list! As for... "Who he's going to be when you're fighting. When money gets tight. When the in-laws get involved" as MM put it ...I've got a lot to learn inshaaAllah! *Any good you find in this 100% from Allah* Alhamdullillah! Here it is: Who are your teachers and what topics do they teach you? Can you teach me something you recently learned? Can you tell me about a time you had doubts about Islam? Would you say those doubts have been resolved or need to be worked on? How did or how do you plan on resolving it; what brought you clarity? (without exposing sins)? (similar to Q from MM recent video) What would you say was the main cause of that distance or doubt (without exposing sins)? Is there a hadith you can share with me that has impacted you recently? (making sure he doesn't reject hadith) What are some names of Allah swt that you have recently sat with? What is a good deed that is particularly beloved to you? Tell me about your family. What is your expectation of a wife in regard to her relationship with your family? What is a lesson you took from your parents marriage? (Similar to Q from MM recent video) What are some lifestyle systems you would like to have or not have in your own marriage? How much of a role does culture play in the way you make decisions? Can you tell me 1 or more things your day does not feel complete without?

A lot of sisters skip this question, or they ask it in a way that gets a polished answer instead of a real one. "Are you religious?" will get you "yes, alhamdulillah" every time. That tells you nothing. Here's what actually works: Ask about the habit, not the label. Skip "are you practicing" and ask something specific: "Walk me through your daily prayers.. on time, in jama'ah, at home?" Specific questions get specific, honest answers. Ask what deen looks like on his hard days. Anyone can look practicing when life is calm. Ask him: "Tell me about a time you were exhausted or overwhelmed.. did your deen show up then, or did it disappear?" That's where you learn if it's real or just for show. Ask about his private relationship with Allah. Public practice tells you about his image. Private practice tells you about his character. Ask: "What does your connection with Allah look like when no one's watching.. Qur'an, dua, istighfar?" You're not trying to catch him out or run an interrogation. You're giving him the chance to be honest with you. A man who's secure in his deen won't flinch at these questions.. he'll actually respect you more for asking them. Clarity now saves you years later.

Mindful Muslimah is planning next YouTube content, and this time I want it to come straight from you.. the women in this community. Mindful Muslimah will be creating few new videos, and she want those video to be exactly what you're going through, curious about, or wish someone would finally talk about. 👇 Drop your topic or title ideas in the comments below. The two that resonate most (or come up the most) will be the ones she create! Can't wait to see what you all want to hear. 🤍