Day 3 strengthening awareness
On my way home from work, thinking about trying to relax. It would be better to meditate than to sleep. The future thoughts of arriving and unwinding before seemed stressing. I get home, investigate. Go to the bathroom, brush my teeth. I go to my room, pull my chair out. Something is off. I remove my beanie, problem-solve. I set my alarm for 5 minutes, adjust the volume so it wouldn't disturb my parents. I begin. It didn't take long to feel amazing, much more rewarding than yesterday. I could breathe. The silent early day, I could relax. I felt the chills on my ear, running down the back of my neck, then along my shoulders. I found myself narrating my sensation as if I was already typing this down, smiling and humored. My left eye duct teared, more like a slight hydration. My right had an itch that felt as if it was underneath the lid, trying to break my concentration. Not today. I kept my eyes shut and my hands together. How much longer did I have? Not just because of the noise the alarm could make, but I could stay like this longer than the alarm goes off. I write down my experience.I start my next 5 minutes. I had random faint thoughts. I didn't really know what to focus on , but then I had a random resonance a thousand times good luck came to my mind. I focus just on that and from my shoulders, all the way up to the top of my head felt sensational. I stayed focused on it a 1000 times good luck, then. I said, I will win this court battle. I will win this court battle. I will win this court battle. I will WIN $1 million a 1000 times good luck, repeating over and over and over this 5 minutes. Shorter than the first.