Why do I lie about stupid things. I will be asked a simple question like did you do this and I will immediately say yes when in reality I know I did not. I will recognize that I lied realize I am wrong and still defend the lie, like it is a joke. Eventually I will tell the truth because I am a bad lier and the quilt devouers me but at that point I have already defended it like it's the truth, that it's hard to tell if it is or not. Right as the person is believing me I tell the truth crushing the trusted bond that we had. Its extremely annoying and hard to come back from. Every time I take a step forward I fall right back and repeat the step sending me right back to the beginning. It's hard looking into the persons eyes that you love the most and realize they won't ever trust you the same again, who would. I know the only thing to do is to be honest and if I tell a lie to immediately own up to it. To any believers how do I continue in a life where I will do good and change my ways for a little maybe even an extraordinary long period of time just to know I am not going to be perfect and I am going to fail again. I don't understand.

Usually when I get defensive I am unwilling to feel or communicate one of my emotions. Which of these do you think is the most common one that causes you or your partner to get defensive? Anger- Shame - Guilt - Fear - Lonely - Sad - Hurt -