Most people think lying is simple. It’s not. Lying is work—and understanding why people lie and how the brain behaves under deception can help civilians navigate everyday life more safely and intelligently. This isn’t about interrogations. It’s about situational awareness, boundaries, and discernment. Why People Lie (At a Human Level) People don’t usually lie because they’re “bad people.” They lie because their brain is trying to avoid consequences. That consequence could be: - Social embarrassment - Reputational damage - Financial loss - Relationship fallout - Accountability When someone feels threatened—emotionally or socially—the nervous system activates, and deception becomes a coping strategy The Hidden Cost of Lying: Cognitive Load Telling the truth is simple. You just recall what happened. Lying is mentally expensive. A person who lies has to: - Suppress the real story - Invent a believable alternative - Keep it consistent over time - Anticipate questions - Monitor how they’re coming across That mental strain often shows up indirectly—not as obvious “tells,” but as subtle changes in behavior What Civilians Often Notice (Without Realizing Why) When someone is under cognitive strain from deception, you may observe: - Delayed or overly careful answers - Vague language instead of specifics - Over-control of emotions (too calm, too rehearsed) - Deflecting instead of directly answering - Inconsistencies over time Important note: These don’t prove someone is lying. But patterns matter more than moments. Emotional “Leakage” Is Real Even when someone tries to control themselves, emotions can leak through: - Anxiety about being exposed - Guilt or shame - Occasionally, subtle satisfaction at “getting away with it” These leaks are often brief and unconscious—which is why listening and observing calmly is more powerful than confrontation Why This Matters for Everyday Life For civilians, this knowledge helps you:

I can't under estimate the value of having a vision. A vision for my personal life, My finances, My relationships, My spiritual life.. And for those who don't know, to perish, doesn't mean to die, but to fade away, to becoming irrelevant.. the slow fading away of importance. I must find my value and my purpose in life. I need to find ways to grow those things in my life. Weather that be from people in my life, online courses, YouTube videos.. coaches or mentors.. And how to implement the things I learn.. I must have a fire inside of me, that drives me for more.. I must be willing to make mistakes and learn from them on the road to more... I love having a community around me that is like minded.. learning and growing together is the best way. We can encourage each other support each other and life each other up along the way. We should be building one another up and guiding each other to a more successful future, not breaking others down and discouraging them.. Let's learn to win, together ❤️

Build It Now, Stay Steady When It Matters Most As we face the possibility of upcoming homeland plotting by terrorist groups, psychological readiness is your foundation. These skills help you stay calm, think clearly, and support each other in any crisis, whether it’s an attack, a natural disaster, or life suddenly going off the rails. If you’ve spent the past year building emergency plans, running drills, and practicing “what if” scenarios, you’re exactly where you need to be. Keep going. You’re not just preparing, you’re building real resilience for yourself, your family, and your community when it matters most. Here’s what we can do next to prepare and stay resilient. Educate Without Fear: When we talk to others about preparedness, the tone matters. The goal is not fear-based. The goal is to give them information, tools, and then most importantly, confidence. Within your family, for example, controlling the narrative means framing the conversation around what you can control, even during something as overwhelming as a terrorist attack. Replace fear-driven talk with practical direction. Use clear, strong language: “Here’s what we do if X happens,” or “We’re safe right now, let’s stick to our plan.” Walk each member of your family through actionable steps: getting to shelter, locking down a workspace, identifying exits, staying put until it’s safe to move. When people have rehearsed actions, their bodies and minds switch into those patterns automatically, even under extreme stress. Helping Children Cope: Children can and do process events very differently, and they depend heavily on the adults around them to set the emotional tone. Keep discussions age appropriate and grounded in the calmest way possible. Do not expose them to graphic news footage or frightening speculation. It overwhelms them and provides no useful information. Instead, focus on safety: who they stay with, where they go, how adults will protect them. Small gestures like holding a hand, offering a hug, sitting beside them all have a very real grounding effect. Use simple, straightforward language: “We have a plan. We know what to do. You’re safe with me.” That sense of predictable structure is what helps kids stay emotionally balanced during and after a crisis.

I want to dive deeper into something that sits at the core of policing, training, and the human experience—but rarely gets the airtime it deserves: Emotional regulation is one of the most powerful forms of crime prevention we have. Not technology. Not policies. Not equipment. Human regulation. Human capacity. Human control. Because when you strip away all the noise, most of what law enforcement deals with is emotion without direction: People who never learned to pause. People who never learned to sit with discomfort. People who never learned to name a feeling before acting on it. People who were raised in environments where chaos was the norm and regulation didn’t exist. Every cop knows this pattern: Somebody can’t handle anger → becomes an assault Somebody can’t handle shame → becomes a lie, a cover-up, or avoidance Somebody can’t handle fear → becomes violence or self-destruction Somebody can’t handle stress → becomes addiction Somebody can’t handle grief → becomes isolation or suicide And this isn’t just individuals. This is generational. This is cultural. This is systemic. If we taught people how to regulate emotions early on: We would see fewer: • Domestic incidents • Fights • Road rage • Juvenile crimes • Relapses • Overdoses • Suicides • Mental health crises • Officer-involved uses of force • Broken relationships and broken families This isn’t hypothetical — it’s observable reality on every shift. Emotional regulation isn’t soft. It’s tactical. It’s the ability to: – Stay stable under pressure – Recognize the difference between a feeling and a fact – Think while the nervous system is screaming – Decelerate when everything inside wants to accelerate – Not weaponize emotion in conflict – Recognize when you’re escalating someone else without realizing it – Use calm as a strategy, not a luxury This is the same skill that makes elite operators effective in combat. It’s the same skill that makes high-level negotiators successful. It’s the same skill that keeps officers alive during critical incidents.