Losing Apache seven months ago broke something open in me. What continues to hold me is the puppies and dogs I’m honoured to work with. In every dog there is magic, and in the quiet moments, I feel it most. This is Frank the Tank, now ten months old. Such a character. His little Staffy huff while he melts into a massage cracks me up every time. Gentle moments like this are where the healing lives. 🤍🐾 Have to add… I feel like a bit of goof sharing this, but that’s ok 🙃🐶

Today I took my dog to have a blood test, for which he needed to be sedated. The vets did this in my van for his comfort. While they were monitoring his heart rate, the vets did would disturb him a little in order to elevate his heart rate from the 30s to the 40+BPM. It had little effect. When I stroked his belly and spoke to him, comforting him telling him is a good boy, his heart rate would rise to a safe 45B. While it’s amazing, it’s not, it is confirmation of the bond and meaning we have in each other’s lives. It was a beautiful, humbling experience.

This is my step stool that Fern has climbed on since she was a puppy. She has certainly outgrown it...but tonight, while I'm cooking she positioned herself in it to get a better view of what's for dinner 😂

So today Pax kept throwing up this morning. 15-20 times. All over the carpets, on the leather couch, my bag and shoes. And after each bout he would come to me, press his weight against me, needing me to steady his presence. He had fear in his eyes. Confusion. That’s rare from him. And far out, the trust he has in me to be there for him was so humbling and I felt this burden on my shoulders to not let him down. But that was bittersweet magic. Such a deep, deep bond but also being worried for him. The thought of losing him scares me to the bottom of my heart. Thankfully he is feeling better now. I found a chicken bone in his vomit. We had a big family bbq last night and when I was cleaning up, he scored a chicken wing from the rubbish. Lightening fast. Pax is allergic to chicken. So yeah, good outcome as he is ok now. But we both knew in that moment when he was so unwell how precious our bond is. We are all on borrowed time. A dog’s love is a powerful teacher in teaching us presence and not taking time for granted. Go and hug your dogs and tell them how amazing they are 🙏💛

Today is the first anniversary of my darling Iota's departure to 'go on ahead', as I like to think of it. He was a dog whose most predominant characteristic was that he was full of the joy of life. He was my Scruffy Ray of Sunshine, my Small But Mighty Butterfly Hunter, and Sir Marks A Lot, amongst other monikers. He was the third member of the crew who became my Fantastic Four, and he was/is a light of my life. I am so deeply grateful for all he brought to me, for the laughter and adventures we shared, the quiet depths and delighted heights of what it was to love one another, and the connection that lives on, golden and shimmering, undimmed. I don't feel up for writing up the remembrance post he truly deserves, but wanted to acknowledge him for the wondrous being he was and is. I love you my remarkable, darling boy. Always and always.