Warning…This is a long one! I am not offended if you don’t read all. My middle daughter and I are in Orlando. I am so grateful for the modules 1-3 and Catherine lecture Tuesday May 5th! Day 1 “I put my ears on”. My daughter stressed with her work that she literally arrived at our long planned Disney restbit “unhinged” and disrespectful to the workers at the airport when she picked me up. She had an arrogant, I deserve everything attitude. We got into the car and she continued ranting. I just paused until the rant was over. Then I just parroted back “It sounds like to me your trip here was very stressful and you didn’t stop a long way and make sure that you had meals or even water am I right?” she agreed. Then I said how about we solve that problem first what are you hungry for? Day 2 As we we’re entering Universal Epoch Studios, She became unhinged again. This time the rant went in for longer and when it was over I paused again. This time I was box breathing because of the rant was personal. ( ignoring the personal insults of my adopted 33-year-old) What came out was, “ so what I hear you saying is that your job is so stressful that you feel like you have no place of peace?” she said yes, then I responded with “ Have you considered what options you’d like to take with that?” she calmed down and I did my best to give her space to think. She spun up two more times in the park. And I used the same tactic. I did eventually fail. And at the end of the evening, when she dressed me down for in the line to the bathroom “Didn’t you just go to the bathroom 15 minutes ago?” So I lost my resolve at 10pm and said “there’s no need to embarrass me in front of this line of people.” And I walked to find another restroom. And instead of following along behind. She left the park, while I was in the restroom. Without any text message or telling me where she went. It was closing time and she abandoned me. With no way to get to the hotel and not even an address for it. She finally answered the text message and told me she went to the car. I had to ask where the car was and with no signs in the parking she to get walk back to find me.

@Tracey Robison would you please reiterate the alternative response to “I did my best” you shared in the class. In addition to it being very triggering due to issues within my FOO (family of origin), my ACs have responded that it feels like excuse making and an unwillingness to take responsibility (dismissive) re the impact of my behaviors, and I cannot disagree with them. Thank you.

Hello, I'm excited to join this group and hoping to meet new people in this community as we find new ways to learn about parenting our grown children.

Unfortunately I had to miss previous session. I wanted to go back and listen. Don't know where to find past sessions.

Background: First daughter (39) single- no children: After official estrangement in 2021, we are building trust in our relationship as I have been keeping her cat since May 2025. (lives a state away) I am thankful for the turn of events. Second daughter (38) married - no children: There has been no official statement of estrangement. (lives a state away) She is going through a difficult divorce since June. I support long-distance via simple messages and hear nothing back. Third daughter (37) single - no children: We are officially estranged since December 2023. (lives across the country) January 2025 she messaged me she was engaged and only told me the gentleman’s first name. She said they would have the ceremony ‘next year,’ which puts it in 2026. I sent a text last evening with the following words: “Good evening, I am curious about wedding plans possibly happening this year. I would to love to attend and thus make plans to be there. With love and support, Mom” I was a single parent for 11 years after a 10 year marriage to their father. He was emotionally abusive and then other abuse toward them after the divorce. I remarried to a good man whom they were fond of When he passed in 2014, while they were in their late twenties, in hindsight, things began to change as a whole. Then, during the pandemic each began to distance in individual ways and timings. The point of my post: I am currently in the middle of module 2 and journaling as I begin the program. While waiting for a response from the third daughter, whom is engaged, about the possible wedding date, I am shaky at work. All kinds of thoughts of how I failed as a parent are swirling in my head. I request. . . suggestions on ways to keep my nervous system regulated to not be anxious and shaky at work, and to be productive at home and not in bed or on the couch. Thank you~