Last June, I ran the first Powerful Parenting Workshop. Some came because their kid was struggling. Some came because they were struggling. Most came because they knew something needed to change, they just didn't know what. I didn't sugarcoat it. I told them the truth: most of what's going on with your kid isn't about your kid. It's about you. Your patterns. Your triggers. Your unhealed stuff. One parent said, "I felt seen as a parent but not judged. I felt validated in my struggles, enlightened by the perspective, and encouraged for better." Another said, "My toolbox was empty when I walked in. I left with my toolbox full." And one of my favorites: "I would recommend this workshop to others, as it is not just for parents going through something difficult. Every parent could get some value from this and get a new perspective of their children and being a parent in today's world." That's what this work is about. It's about good parents raising their standards. Parents who care deeply but know there's more to learn. Parents who want to create connection, heal old wounds, and show up powerfully for the people who matter most. I'm a coach. I work with their kids every day. I see their struggles. Their strengths. Their potential. I also see the parents doing trying their best. And here's what I know: the most powerful thing I can do for a kid isn't just teach them jiu jitsu. It's help their parents show up powerfully at home. Because kids don't just need great coaches. They need great parents. Parents who lead with empathy and boundaries. Parents who validate feelings and set clear expectations. Parents who repair when they mess up. Parents who model the emotional regulation they want to see in their kids. That's what powerful parenting is. Most of us parent the way we were parented. We use the same phrases. We set the same boundaries. Or don't. We react the same way our parents reacted and most of the time, we don't even realize it. But here's the truth: the way you were parented shaped you. And the way you parent is shaping your kids.If you don't take the time to look under the hood, to examine your patterns, your triggers, your default responses; you'll keep repeating the cycle.

This Saturday, I competed. Four matches. Two divisions. 1st place in gi, 2nd in no-gi. But the real win? Watching my student-athletes step on the mat with courage, composure, and heart. I spent most of my morning coaching the kids, managing their nerves, celebrating their effort. Then I had to flip the switch and become a competitor myself. The mindset I've been coaching all week? Breathe. Flow. Play. Here's what I learned when I had to live it. The Mindset: Breathe, Flow, Play (Sort Of) Competition nerves are real. Even after years of training, your body knows when it's game time. My focus all morning? Breathing. Staying regulated. Managing the nerves without letting them manage me. Did "breathe, flow, play" work perfectly? Not entirely. But it worked enough. I kept my composure under pressure. I stayed present when stuck in bad positions. I didn't panic, didn't force, didn't freeze. Could I have pushed a better pace? Absolutely. But I'm satisfied with my performance and more importantly, I walked away with clarity on what to work on for the next one. Preparation got me there. Breathing kept me grounded. And now I know what's next. What Surprised Me Most? The Kids. I'm always impressed by my student-athletes, but watching them compete never gets old. Their resilience. Their composure. Their ability to adapt under pressure. These kids step onto the mat knowing they might lose. Knowing people are watching. Knowing it's uncomfortable. And they do it anyway. That's not just martial arts. That's character. I competed Saturday, but honestly? Those kids inspire me the most. The Real Takeaway: Courage Over Judgment Here's what I tell my students before every competition: When you step on that mat, you might fear judgment. But the only thing people see is your courage to step out there in the first place. No one's critiquing your technique. They're celebrating your willingness to try. And for parents and leaders? The best way to get your kids to compete isn't to push them. It's to model it yourself. I'm not naturally a competitive person. I'm just a chill guy who likes to have fun while pushing myself. But my students needed to see that even their coach steps into the uncomfortable.

Let Your Spouse Go on That Trip 🌴 Marriage isn't about being together every moment. It's about giving each other the freedom to grow, explore, and return with more to share. Kamila was in Florida over the weekend to visit a longtime friend. And instead of feeling threatened or worried about her absence, I was excited. Not just for her but for me. Too many couples lose themselves in the relationship. They become so intertwined that individual dreams start to suffocate. But true partnership isn't about being identical, it's about being two whole people who choose each other, again and again. This weekend, while she reconnected with her friend, I dove into my projects. Book editing. Content creation. Went to the movies, solo. Possible food poisoning to wrap up the weekend? We're not just supporting each other's journeys, we're actively encouraging them. Individualism in marriage isn't selfish. It's essential. When Kamila returns, she'll have stories, energy, and experiences that make her more herself. And that makes our relationship richer. Wins - Completed book editing sprint - Create concepts for the book cover - Maintained daily content posting - Continued Coach V3 brand development - Supported Kamila's trip to Florida - Saw "The Smashing Machine" by myself Challenges - Balancing book project with Utopia operations - Maintaining consistent social media growth This Week's To-Dos - Finish book formatting - Continue Utopia operations planning - Support new assistant coach development Closing Thought: Marriage is about teamwork, and also requires each other to grow yourself while growing as a couple. This week, do one thing that's just for you. And encourage your partner to do the same. What will you reclaim for yourself this week? ⬇️

Did yall practice gratitude today? What are you thankful for, big or small?

This post isn't necessarily for the audience. Because well, we are starting with zero. This post is for me. Since I am the only one here, I can start strong in honesty and transparency. Honestly, I have no idea what I am doing... But I have something special, and I know if you are joining this community, you do too. I view this as a organic chance to not only grow myself, but grow with those who are along with the ride. I view myself as a coach, mentor, and a person of influence. I don't want this to be just another group, my vision for this community is a place where we show up daily with the goal of becoming 1% better. Small wins, stacked daily, lead to massive change. Kaizen teaches us that growth doesn’t come from huge leaps, but from consistent, intentional action. In training, in leadership, in family life . It’s the 1% improvements that compound into mastery. This space is for leaders, athletes, parents, and coaches who want more; more confidence, more clarity, and more connection. Together, we’ll share strategies, support, and stories that fuel progress. Think of it like sharpening the sword, every single day. When you find this place, and I know most will. I invite you to consider this your advantage. This is where we take the first step, once your here. Please let me know how we can best support you! -Coach Vern