I have started a new habit in an attempt to save my life. I am on day 15. To say it is terrifying and grueling js an understatement. Yet, I see how it is keeping me hanging on. Just wanted to say i love you guys.

All I can say is "life" is kicking me HARD at the moment. But that being said, I'm realizing the more I release the more capacity I will have! And I've had MASSIVE releases the past few days. And STILL took care of Lilly. So OF COURSE I'm exhausted.. not in a negative way but an authentic way. I've also put more boundaries in. Because she was literally depleting (unnecessarily) the few resources I had. That being said, the FACT is that this morning I was doubled over in stomach pain (not like the appendix thank God but definitely more than mild).. and for ME, being a single mom without reliable help, that feels DANGEROUS. Like I can't do my job as a mom etc. However, the FACT is, despite a part of me wanting to ignore it, I've actually slowed down and let myself feel.. and the pain has lessened. My body is still integrating but holy cow did I have some breakthroughs! One thing I've done that is a NON negotiable whenever humanly possible, is i go to the car now every morning. Today was day 10.. I almost didn't go. But now I KNOW it is like oxygen for me. It is me being consistent for MYSELF every single day. That NO ONE can take away. It is a release valve for me. THIS is how I'm gaining traction when the little bit of help I was promised is not following through. I am opting out of chaos. Opting out of unnecessary frantic energy etc. MY house is and will be a safe place. Peaceful. I did a meditation today and the number one value I came up with was peace. I'm still open to help of course..but no longer at the expense of foundation. A foundation I'm trying to build. I'm reminding myself EVERY tear I shed now, every time I lay down even though I don't think I should have to... I'm getting a head start on summer. I'm RELEASING soo much at such a deep level. Under really stressful conditions. But that's the point. The universe is testing me. I always get water metaphors and this one jist came to me of how you have to swim in the choppy waters before you get past the break.. and it is smooth. I'm IN the choppy waters

https://youtu.be/zw4swglAnrE?si=tAV31aYfW8jlquSO

Merry Christmas everyone and hope you are enjoying yourself

Good morning family 🥰 As 2025 draws to a close (what??🤯😅), there are certain things I want to leave behind in 2025. The biggest one by far for me is self criticism. I've been continuing to do a LOT of work every day on noticing unhealthy patterns and identifying where they came from etc. And the bottom line is, these thoughts that try to keep me down aren't even mine!! They're from faulty programming to say the least. It is a process but I'm glad to be in it because that means change IS happening! What is one thing you want to leave behind in 2025? Let's take out the garbage so we can be more FREE in 2026😍