We touched a little on love languages in a previous post and some of you shared your love language, which got me wondering, how do you show your partner love. Do you know your partners love language and show them love in a way they will understand. For example- I know one of Kristys love languages are words of affirmation so I leave little notes around the house for her to find telling her how I feel about her. So my question is - do you know your partners love language and what do you do to show them love in their language 🤔

My partner is going to do a pet sit this week (organised via well a known website). Its at the pet owners home for 3 weeks while the owners go on holiday. Only for the last few weeks, she has heard nothing from the owners and the sit starts on Thursday. Kristy has tried contacting the owners numerous times and heard nothing, which is causing her to get stressed about the situation. So what do I do in these sorts of situations, being a bloke? I try to fix and offer all sorts of solutions. This is the most natural thing for me to do being: man...... the hairy hunter and fixer of all...🫡 However, this does not help as then the stress gets aimed towards me. Did I ask if she needed any solution ...nope Did I ask if she needed help...nope So how does this feel to her? Disempowering..... like she's helpless and can't sort things for herself. A tool we use when these sort of situations arise lies in one easy question: Do you need, comfort, space or solution? Comfort ~ a cuddle and a shoulder to lean on. Space ~ left to resolve it on their own without interference OR space held to just be heard Solution ~ to put your heads together to come up with something that works. No assumptions and no taking over as man the hairy hunter. Just help 🙂 Makes things so easy!

Everybody is banging on about it on social media...... how to change your attachment style in 4 easy steps..... you can go from avoidant to secure in just a few weeks etc. Yes, you can change your attachment style, but what's not being said is that it takes time, alot of work and by no means is there an easy fix. No one else can do it for you. Here at Bridging the Divide you can be taken through an 8 week course that covers Attachment styles, amongst other modules, and be given the tools to start changing your relationship for the better. Yes, it take some patience, commitment and work on your behalf and no, its not always easy, but it's certainly worth it. Oh..... and it's much cheaper than a divorce lawyer 🤑

My first day off work today, and I've done absolutely nothing. Been looking forward to a dressing gown and TV day. I work hard and long hours, yet feel so guilty for doing nothing. Why does it feel like I'm wasting the day by simply relaxing? Why do I feel guilty for not doing jobs around the house and giving myself the time to just chill for one day? My brain refuses to calm, it's got to keep looking for things to do, it refuses to shut up and just rest. As soon as I try, the little voice kicks in..... what are you doing ? ....you're just lazy ! .... you haven't got time to sit around when theres things to be done..... Why couldn't the H in ADHD stand for happy 🤪