Well hello there! Not really I think everyone already knows well enough who I am... I'm the raccoon that lurks around this Skool group 🦝💀 well, sometimes. Other times I drop off the face of the planet 🪐 anyway, me over text and video call version are drastically different 😂 I was reminded of that today... Anyway I have the fifth installment of my raccoon story if y'all are interested 🫣 I didn't think a lot of people liked my writing, it's weird. Y'know what's also weird? Receiving comfort and help from someone outside your family after having it in your head that your family only really helped you out of obligation that's weird, so when that happened... Well I needed a lot of reassurance.. funny stuff (not really) On another topic, humans are incredible actors... Some don't realize they do it, whereas let's say a depressed person knows that they're just playing a part, making sure everyone else is okay while their world implodes, and honestly it's scary when your inner world starts imploding.. really scary, like all you want is silence but your mind is anything but and that's because you finally opened up that file cabinet 🗄️ and every emotion you've ever shoved in there explodes and immediately wants to be processed and accepted... It's stressful and drives people to things like addiction and in some cases it gets to the point where that person doesn't exist anymore... That's the scary part, cause most suicidal people probably don't want to die but they want to escape, silence, rest and a plethora of other things that their lives aren't giving them because of their circumstances. I used to wonder what drove people to that point, well now I know what drives people to those things. Things like addiction and self injury distract the person from the overwhelming feelings and their trauma, gives them something else to focus on. Makes their lives bearable when they've given up, so I guess my message I'm trying to get across is: have a trustworthy support system, cause when everything else fails all some people can do is live for someone else until they find a reason to live for themselves.. anyway thanks for dipping into some dark waters today here's the promised continuation of the story ⤵️

🗞️News just in... My secondhand laptop 💻 finally died, thankfully my mom @Sarah Hankins was open to letting me use her old laptop.... Which contrary to telling me it was slow, it works faster than my other one ever did, secondly the one she sent me is FUCKING huge and getting used to the format of it is HARD 💀 not my favorite thing, but, but, but it works so that's all I needed it to do 😮‍💨 Anyway! Been mulling over a story idea for roughly a few consecutive months, doubted it, got excited, procrastinated. Everything you would think I needed to do to be able to write 🥴 silly me. But anyway here's the first bit. I have yet to work out the title but I'm loving how it's moving along 😂 also I added some art and the comparison photos I took of the two laptop keyboards... There's definitely a BIG difference (The story 🔽) Once upon a…. Wait, hold on I don’t think this is a fairy tale is it? Who knows, but hello there! I am Raccoon.. Yes an actual raccoon or a trash panda if you will, no it’s not satire… Although that would probably sell more copies, the scratching of charcoal against the greasy wrapper from the hamburger I had eaten earlier in the day (Which would be evening to twilight to my non nocturnal readers) halted, I had been writing on a food wrapper I had scavenged out of what a city dwelling raccoon informed me was a dumpster. My furry face morphs into a contemplative expression, tapping my chin. I scurry about my small den beneath a weathered old birch thinking about selling my life’s story as a satirical novel to distract my fellow creatures from the destruction that the hairless two leg mammals are wreaking on our precious habitats; with their monstrous highways and heinous things my dear friend Opossum calls automobiles which I lost my mate and kits to many a fortnight ago, I approached my desk again, spitting on my paws slicking my ears back and resumed writing. Perhaps it should be satire… but that would mean to make light of trauma and my great loss of life belonging once to my family of four kits and my mate, so I shall not be making my tragedy into a laughable mockery for the sake of it, so I am indeed a raccoon and this is my story, read it or don’t I could give a field mouse’s droppings.

(contains the sixth part of Dumpster's Plight) Resident goofball here and firstly I'm gonna say that my chart is PICKY well I guess that makes me picky then 😂 cause I was messing around with the Vita bot and asked it some questions about romantic relationships and how that would look like for an individual with an undefined g-center cause I don't got mine defined 😅 and I definitely laughed a little at the information I received. And the fact that it made good sense was actually bonkers to me. Romantic/sexual relationships are finicky things and for awhile I thought I was asexual which means an individual doesn't experience sexual attraction but however I discovered that eventually I do want to explore those things, and it's quite interesting to think about because once upon a time I wasn't fond of the idea of being intimate with someone 🤣 life has a funny way of kicking you in the rear does it not? Also while therapy has definitely been helpful and beneficial to my position in my journey I'm quite stuck cause recently I've been feeling a massive amount of burnout and it's crisping my brain substantially, BUT healing isn't linear or cyclical it's more like squiggles and crayon scribbles, cause healing isn't a straight line and it's not going around in circles so it's squiggly cause you've got ups and downs 🫠 however most people choose not to do the messy work because it's not clean and they don't wanna deal with it in the slightest but some people are either brave or stupid enough to try it out. I am one of those people 🫣🦝 but my question for you is what are you going to do when your healed (healing never really stops). Are you going to be that parent that is enthusiastically praising yourself for creating such a messy crayon scribble masterpiece? Or are you going to be that parent that barely looks up from their work and makes a non-committal sound leaving you feeling like your hope and healing was for nothing, it wasn't for nothing you should be proud of yourself for making it this far because in reality not a lot of people are willing to dip into that messiness and most of the time they'll take one look at your masterpiece hanging on the fridge and tell you that it "looks like garbage" or "you wasted your time!" Those people are just ignorant and insecure in their own life, they don't want to admit that they're scared of the fact that you did the hard stuff. But you should be proud and whatnot with yourself for making that scribbly masterpiece 🖍️🦝

It has been a wild month and my emotions have finally cleared! I feel my body shifting in ways I've never experienced before. @Quincy Richardson was able to see his doctor in New Mexico and re-establish care after 8 years! Lyme is no joke and I'm so stoked for this next phase because it includes clean eating and he is feeling better!!! The type of survival we've been in has made eating healthy, feel impossible. We've eaten clean for most of their lives but since the hurricane in 2017, things kinda went to shit... I'm five days in and the headaches are mostly gone and my inflammation is going down! Human Design has been leading the way with every step of our health, emotions, focus, and passions. So many things have been becoming clear as the fog lifts! You know how you can see things in hindsight but at the moment it doesn't make sense?!?! But, then you do it anyway and everything turns out awesome! Check this out.... At the same time, things came to a head with Reid, I added the $10/mo to FHD. Most people said it was a wrong move but I knew it needed to be done. I didn't know we would be moving within weeks and I would not have been able to maintain FHD while packing and helping my people adjust to life on the road, had we kept the community free. This shift gave me the pause that I needed to be able to shift my entire family! During that season, Skool shipped tiers!!! Sooooo, we are back to FREE, and a $10/mo Premium option!!! And Worthy also has a more affordable tier and is expanding to include ALL the Vulnerable Leadership teaching! We are shooting new videos and taking action on our crazy plans this week! Costumes, abandoned buildings, with laughter and rage! It's going to be a blast!!! How has harvest season been treating you? This is my favorite time of year, it's like karma season every fall! 😂

(includes the third or fourth installment of the nameless story) Life has a funny way of kicking your ass does it not? Like you think you're doing all you can at the moment then somebody (in this case @Jes Divine and @Truth Richardson ) just comes and kicks the carefully smoothed calmed dust up and you're left there covered in dirt but you see the stuff that you really aren't doing and it just a) makes you uncomfortable and b) makes you realize that there's more you need to be doing of you want to get better 😂 it's quite the learning curve and this raccoon never really got the hang of regulating and validating myself because I don't think I've ever had a healthy example of what that looks like, cause people say affirmations work wonders? They don't really for me, they just kinda settle in my chest and make me feel shitty about myself (even if it's the truth...) like I can't really remember when the last time I felt proud of myself because contrary to this conversation I was having with Jes and I told her that no emotions are bad or good, just neutral... I think being proud of myself is bad, y'know why? Cause I don't like being self absorbed (does being proud of yourself involve being self absorbed? I dunno I could be wrong) Like I've always felt kind of ashamed to like buy things just for me even if it was simply a KitKat bar, so imagine trying to feel proud of yourself if you feel bad for buying yourself a dang KitKat of all things?! Like geez, anyway it's a work in progress but this time progress is slow but progress is progress. (Next installment of the nameless story ⤵️🦝) While waiting for another blasted water dwelling creature to show its face a sharp meow pierced the air followed by the appearance of a lanky looking orange cat. “Oh Bobble! I’ve searched everywhere for you!” The cat purred, speaking the language of the beings, prancing over to Bobble and rubbing against the opossum. I looked at the cat and contemplated attacking the feline, his guard was down and I was hungry. “Pickle!” Bobble greeted the cat, I ditched the creek water and my fur raised as I calculated the likelihood of me being able to take down the fruity acting cat, Pickle and Bobble reacquainted themselves while I raised to my hind legs and prepared for my assault, Pickle and Bobble seemed rather unaware of my looming attack. “Why are you in this messy forest, Bobble?” Pickle asked, tilting his head at Bobble waiting for an answer, Bobble’s body language shrank and I paused my preparation briefly to watch the opossum’s demeanor physically deflate. “Pickle… I-I uhm don’t think that’s a safe conversation topic…” There was a flicker of something I perceived as bitterness or even deep seated resentment, I chirped at the opossum and waddled over and nosed her chest. “Dumpster..” The opossum’s voice had taken on a strained quality, Pickle’s tail poofed up, the feline yowling at me “Bobble, you cannot tell me that you are associating with this… dumpster dweller!” He chirped, I nuzzled Bobble again then attacked Pickle, I clawed at him viciously. Pickle whined and yowled. This bug-eyed cat was rather cowardly if I do say so myself, orange fur flew around us as I continued my merciless attack. Bobble scampered over and bit my tail, dragging me off the melodramatic animal.